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George Carlin Pet Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "George Carlin Pet" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
George Carlin
85 Likes
Funny Christmas quotes
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I was scared to death because for the comics of my generation, HBO specials are like the pinnacle. I'm thinking of all these unbelievable comedians I've seen on HBO: Chris Rock, George Carlin, Damon Wayans, Richard Pryor and Billy Crystal. I started having a panic attack seeing my name in that list of people. It was pretty overwhelming.
Bill Burr
17 Likes
When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". F*ck off. What good is a goddamn cake you can't eat? What should I eat, someone else's cake instead?
George Carlin
42 Likes
Sarcastic Life quotes
People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think
George Carlin
12 Likes
Thinking quotes
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This is a little prayer dedicated to the separation of church and state. I guess if they are going to force those kids to pray in schools they might as well have a nice prayer like this: Our Father who art in heaven, and to the republic for which it stands, thy kingdom come, one nation indivisible as in heaven, give us this day as we forgive those who so proudly we hail. Crown thy good into temptation but deliver us from the twilight's last gleaming. Amen and Awomen.
George Carlin
37 Likes
Religion quotes
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Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?
George Carlin
15 Likes
Too much of anything is never enough. Too much of everything is never enough.
Pet Shop Boys
1 Likes
I'ma beast. You a pet.
Young Money
9 Likes
You need love.
Pet Shop Boys
1 Likes
The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating... ...and you finish off as an orgasm.
George Carlin
168 Likes
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I don't want to be buried in a pet cemetery.
The Ramones
3 Likes
We all have our pet things that we like to get religious about.
Max Cannon
1 Likes
Somewhere chic on another shore. You need more, you need more.
Pet Shop Boys
4 Likes
I don't need to fantasize. You are my pet all the time.
Godsmack
1 Likes
I really don't know how to comfort people...I just pet them and say everything's going to be okay
Unknown
5 Likes
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I don't want to be buried in a Pet Sematary.
Ramones
0 Likes
Pitbulls are like a gun you can pet.
Bill Burr
11 Likes
When we got with George, he didn't care what was happening. He liked how crazy we were looking and dressing. I kinda liked being with George more so at the time, because George let us do what we wanted to do. But I needed both lessons.
Bootsy Collins
0 Likes
I think there's something great and generic about goldfish. They're everybody's first pet.
Paul Rudd
0 Likes
Pet me, touch me, love me, that's what I get when I perform. That's when I'm really getting what I want.
Connie Stevens
0 Likes
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