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Joe Ball Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Joe Ball" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
This guy from L.A. sits down next to me, and he says 'you like baseball?' I said, 'Oh, man, I love baseball.' So he goes 'Did you know that if Jesus had played ball, he'd have been the greatest ball player ever?' Like I'm gonna argue with that logic. So I sat there for a second, and then I said 'did you know that if Babe Ruth had been the Messiah, the Catholics would have beer and hot dogs at Communion?' He left.
Bill Engvall
8 Likes
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The audience changes every night. You're the same person. You have to speak your mind and do the stuff that you think is funny and makes you laugh.
Joe Rogan Joe Rogan
6 Likes
If you take all that I've learned from Joe and all that Joe has learned from me, and you throw all that into a song, not only are you using the gifts that God gave you, but also all the experiences you've had.
Steven Tyler
2 Likes
I can't hit a ball more than 200 yards. I have no butt. You need a butt if you're going to hit a golf ball.
Dennis Quaid
2 Likes
My mother and father, Joe and Theresa Montana brought me along and taught me to never quit, and to strive to be the best.
Joe Montana
16 Likes
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Now, people when I say that look at me and say, 'What are you talking about, Joe? You're telling me we have to go spend money to keep from going bankrupt?'. The answer is yes, that's what I'm telling you.
Joe Biden
14 Likes
Is this where you wanna be when Jesus comes back, makin fun of poor little Joe Dirt?
Joe Dirt
21 Likes
I thought for like five years that when you have s.., you come and one of your balls comes out. That's what I thought happened, that you have to come a ball out of that little whole at the tip of your d..k. I was terrified! That's what I thought, you just...Bahh! And you push a ball out and she's screaming and there's blood everywhere...and you can only do it twice and then you're out of balls. That's what I thought. You come and have two babies, and then you just walk around with an empty sack for the rest of your life. Which turned out to be true...
Louis CK
12 Likes
We're basically after Joe's beer money, and Joe likes his beer, so you better make sure that what you give him is at least as pleasurable to him as having his six-pack of beer would be.
Jerry Pournelle
8 Likes
Not only that, but when I first met Joe, to my intense delight, he showed me that he was a collector. He was collecting some of the early Tarzan pages by Hal Foster, and, later, early Flash Gordons; and I found that we were both absolutely interested in the same type of thing.
Joe Shuster
3 Likes
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He was all emotion all the time, constantly talking about his feelings and his profound love for her. He was minutes from getting his first period. He wrote poems too. It's my personal belief that if men are writing poems, they're making up for something else like a big hair back, or one ball. Not that one ball is a bad thing. Especially since I don't know any females who are dying to their their hands on a set of balls. The way I see it, the less balls, the better.
Chelsea Handler
25 Likes
Things are gonna happen for me. I'm Joe Dirt!
Joe Dirt
18 Likes
I can't hit a ball more than 200 yards. I have no butt. You need a butt if you're going to hit a golf ball.
Dennis Quaid
0 Likes
Golf quotes
When you hear Joe you hear that conviction, and diction, that open emotion, devotion is different.
Joe Budden
27 Likes
Devotion quotes
Ball 'til I fall I done did it for my dawgs. Ball 'til I fall I done did it for y'all.
Birdman
13 Likes
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Can I throw harder than Joe Wood? Listen mister, no man alive can throw any harder than Smokey Joe Wood.
Walter Johnson
0 Likes
Nick has Joe's haircut. Joe has Nick's curly hair. Now we can call them ''Joick Jonas and Joick Jonas'.' They're fifty-fifty.
Unknown
26 Likes
Don't worry, Joe. Maybe you knew it was gonna happen to me, maybe you didn't. But by the old way of doin' things... If I became boss now, I'd have to hit you in case you knew. And all of you shrug, except some of you are friends of Joe's. And one day I might do something that upsets you, so then you'll hit me. And then YOU'LL become boss. My friends, they'll hate you for that. Then somebody else becomes boss, and so on, and on... You know what I call that? Stupid. Very stupid... We're all bosses here.
Lucky Luciano
40 Likes
He knows all the golf lingo. You know? You hit your ball, he's like "there's a golf shot. That's a golf shot." Well of course it's a golf shot; I just hit a golf ball. You don't see Gretzky skating around going 'there's a hockey shot, that's a hockey shot.'
Bill Engvall
0 Likes
The more things you do, the more you can do.
Lucille Ball
3 Likes
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