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Funny Quotes About Funny

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5235 Funny quotes tagged with Funny.

QUOTES

Wal-Mart: The only place on earth you can get a haircut, eye exam, ice cream sandwich, tires for your car, and witness a real life what not to wear episode...

20 Likes

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On Mercury a day lasts 1,408 hours. Just like every Monday does on earth...

36 Likes

If you meet my expectations, please ask them to come home.

John Alejandro King

22 Likes

Expectations quotes

On the 12th day of Christmas my Facebook gave to me 12 chicks I'm blocking, 11 friends just watching, 10 corny topics, 9 busted Barbies, 8 friends complaining, 7 stalkers stalking, 6 party invites, fiiiivvvveeee drama queens, 4 game requests, 3 photo tags, 2 friends a pokin' and a ex who won't stop inboxing me!

99 Likes

Facebook quotes

Christmas quotes

Facebook Status quotes

Put on your yarmulke, Here comes Hanukkah! So much funukah, To celebrate Hanukkah! Hanukkah is the festival of lights. Instead of one day of presents, we have eight crazy nights.

14 Likes

Hanukkah quotes

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Christmas brings enormous electric bills. Candles are used for Hanukkah. Not only are we spared enormous electric bills, but we get to feel good about not contributing to the energy crisis.

7 Likes

Hanukkah quotes

Christmas quotes

Electricity quotes

The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself... and spiders! Happy Halloween!

15 Likes

Halloween quotes

America's one of the finest countries anyone ever stole.

Bobcat Goldthwaite

26 Likes

Columbus Day quotes

I also hate those holidays that fall on a Monday where you don't get mail, those fake holidays like Columbus Day. What did Christopher Columbus do, discover America? If he hadn't, somebody else would have and we'd still be here. Big deal.

13 Likes

Columbus Day quotes

I like my men like I like my tea: hot and strong!

45 Likes

Relationship quotes

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The mind of a woman: If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.

22 Likes

Making Decisions quotes

My Top 5 Exercises: 1. Jumping to conclusions 2. Flying off the handle 3. Carrying things too far 4. Dodging responsibilities 5. Pushing my Luck

75 Likes

Exercise quotes

Attitude quotes

I used to believe in freedom of speech until I had to pay my first phone bill.

128 Likes

Cell Phone quotes

A single loyal friend is worth more than a house full of pesky relatives.

William E Lewis Jr

36 Likes

Relatives quotes

People fear what they don't understand: Change, Death, 4th grade math word problems. . .

19 Likes

Humorous quotes

Mathematics quotes

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There are two types of people in this world. The people who are in tune with reality and those who watch Love & Hip-hop.

10 Likes

Roses are red Violets are blue Our presidential candidates are morons America is doomed

62 Likes

Politics quotes

Elections quotes

Democrats quotes

Republicans quotes

A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it.

George Bernard Shaw

42 Likes

Pessimism quotes

Negative People quotes

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.

50 Likes

I am still waiting for the day I'll use MATHEMATICS integration in real Life.

Derrick Obedgiu

28 Likes

High School quotes

Mathematics quotes

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