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Funny Night Shiftht Shift Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Night Shiftht Shift" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Its a funny thing that when a man hasnt anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married.
Unknown
64 Likes
Funny Marriage quotes
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The moon looks upon many night flowers; the night flowers see but one moon.
Jean Ingelow
3 Likes
"I love the inpatience of New York... You ever had somebody not-ask you for directions, but demand them? You're just innocently walking down the street, you hear a horn, all of a sudden some guy's like, 'HOLLAND TUNNEL!!!' ...You know like you were supposed to fax this guy directions. Suddenly, you're wasting HIS time. 'Let's go buddy! Holland tunnel!' '...Uh..I-I was just going to the store... I didn't realize it was my shift. Well, let's see... the Holland Tunnel is in my ass... alright?"
Jim Gaffigan
1 Likes
Comedy quotes
The most important thing is to write material that YOU think is funny. If you don't think it's funny, but you're convinced that other people will think it is, well they won't.
Mo Rocca
4 Likes
Treat me like a joke, watch me leave you like its funny
Unknown
645 Likes
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I'll go to great lengths to scavenge other devices for batteries, before I will go out to buy new ones.
Unknown
362 Likes
Funny quotes
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I was going to do something today but I haven't finished doing nothing from yesterday.
Unknown
114 Likes
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If I found out I only had a week to live, and could go anywhere in the world, I think I'd go to the hospital because that sounds serious.
Unknown
795 Likes
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It's hard to lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse.
Adlai Stevenson
72 Likes
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Deja Vu is when God thinks something is so funny, that he has to rewind it to show it to his friends.
Unknown
509 Likes
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I was going to make a gay joke...butt f*ck it...
Unknown
618 Likes
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I do not think that obsession is funny or that not being able to stop one's intensity is funny.
Jim Dine
3 Likes
People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant.
Ellen DeGeneres
2727 Likes
Funny quotes
But I think funny and talent will always win out; I mean, of course there are hurdles, but I think if you're funny you will get over all of that.
Wanda Sykes
2 Likes
i think I might like you funny huh. yeah really funny. but do i? I guess ill never know
Unknown
40 Likes
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With her little funny eyes of hazel. With her little funny old blue hat.
Kerli
5 Likes
In every circle of friends there's always that one person everyone secretly hates. Don't have one? Then it's probably you.
Will Ferrell
1154 Likes
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Eternal God, this holy night is radiant with the brilliance of your one true light. May that light illuminate our hearts and shine in our words and deeds. May the hope, the peace, the joy, and the love represented by the birth in Bethlehem this night fill our lives and become part of all that we say and do. May we share the divine life of your son Jesus Christ, even as he humbled himself to share our humanity. Amen.
Rev Richard J Fairchild
16 Likes
Christian Christmas quotes
"I love the inpatience of New York... You ever had somebody not-ask you for directions, but demand them? You're just innocently walking down the street, you hear a horn, all of a sudden some guy's like, 'HOLLAND TUNNEL!!!' ...You know like you were supposed to fax this guy directions. Suddenly, you're wasting HIS time. 'Let's go buddy! Holland tunnel!' '...Uh..I-I was just going to the store... I didn't realize it was my shift. Well, let's see... the Holland Tunnel is in my ass... alright?"
Jim Gaffigan
2 Likes
Humor quotes
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My resolution is to decipher the hidden meaning in your resolution.
Unknown
39 Likes
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