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Funny Twitter Bioholes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Twitter Bioholes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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On the 12th Day of Christmas my Facebook gave to me, 12 dudes I'm blocking, 11 friends just watching, 10 corny topics, 9 busted barbies, 8 friends complaining, 7 stalkers stalking, 6 party invites, Fiiiiiiiiiiiiive Drama Queeeensssss, 4 game requests, 3 photo tags, 2 friends-a-pokin & a creep who won't stop inboxing meeee!
Unknown
1205 Likes
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If you're a dude and it takes more than 20 seconds to take of your jeans because it's tight,You Gay !
Boat_Grandberry
51 Likes
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Seeing the irresponsibly dangerous stunts in the Spider-Man musical has prepared me for your New Year's behavior.
Unknown
8 Likes
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Behind every successful student, there is a deactivated Facebook account.
Unknown
948 Likes
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Gaining 20 lbs over the holidays makes your New Year's resolution of losing 10 less impressive.
Unknown
8 Likes
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I hope the world ends in 2012 so I can't be held accountable for my New Year's resolutions.
Unknown
15 Likes
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Well hello, Mr. Hoodie. It has been a while since I needed to wear you. Hope you had a relaxing summer...now its back to work for you!
Unknown
35 Likes
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Life is not a garden, don't be a hoe.
Unknown
1840 Likes
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Ok summer I'm sorry for bad mouthing you bout being so hot, can you come back?? Its freakin cold!
Unknown
68 Likes
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I could be a morning person. If morning happened to be around noon.
Unknown
248 Likes
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Let's decide which champagne we're going to barf.
Unknown
4 Likes
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There was one thing where David Cross was doing a scene and he was showing me his cutoff shorts and he throws them at my chest. And he had to stop throwing them at my chest because every time he did I started laughing. And it was so funny. It would have been so funny on the show but it's not even on the show anymore because I couldn't do it without laughing. He would just hurl the shorts into my chest. I robbed all the viewers of a funny thing because I couldn't stop laughing.
Michael Cera
3 Likes
Sorry you're finally mature enough to just want a quiet evening with friends on New Year's Eve.
Unknown
9 Likes
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It's harder to be funny if you're handsome than if you're very normal-looking. It's just more relatable. You're the underdog. I mean it's funny to see people struggle, and you don't buy that Brad Pitt is struggling, you know that guy could be the most skill-less guy in the world, but if you look like that you will be fine for the rest of your life.
Jonah Hill
11 Likes
The one thing women don't want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband.
Joan Rivers
18 Likes
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Life can be funny and serious. We either laugh over it or cry over it. But Life itself doesn't care about such reactions. It goes on.
Terry Mark
126 Likes
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Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair.
Sam Ewing
20 Likes
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Christmas gift shopping is cancelled due to the world ending Dec 23.
Unknown
107 Likes
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Comedy is way more difficult than drama. What I might find funny, the editor might not find funny. They might choose the reaction shot from Take 4 with my line from Take 1 with my next line from Take 7, and then the timing that I was trying to do does not come across.
Neil Patrick Harris
0 Likes
That awkward moment during a test and you don't know any of the answers, so you just start laughing because you know you're screwed.
Unknown
1123 Likes
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