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Funny Valentines Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Valentines Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Relationships are like fat people, most of them don't work out.
Unknown
2419 Likes
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Id do anything for a perfect beach body, except work out and eat less.
Unknown
160 Likes
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I am sitting here looking at the most amazing person I have ever seen, smart, funny, caring, and absolutely stunning! Yes, I am looking in the mirror!
Ash Sweeney
585 Likes
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Nothing Steve Jobs ever created could fully replace you in my life.
Unknown
44 Likes
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Roses are red, violets are blue. If your man is busy on Valentines Day, then the side chick is you.
Unknown
381 Likes
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Don't talk to me about Valentines Day. At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!
Joan Rivers
246 Likes
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The awkward moment when you realize Valentines day is approaching fast and the only one who loves you is your pet...
Unknown
236 Likes
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Single people pretend like being single on Valentines doesn't suck...Yeah right, I used to hate it.
Kalin Leonard
93 Likes
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Dont talk to me about Valentines Day. At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!
Joan Rivers
122 Likes
Valentines Day quotes
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A dozen roses: $12, a box of chocolates: $10, a Happy Valentines Day card: $2, still having $24 dollars because you're single: priceless!
Unknown
193 Likes
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Valentines Day isn't a real holiday it's just for commercial purposes...coming from me who is single.
Unknown
74 Likes
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Valentines Day is cute and all, but that one person making you feel special daily is priceless.
Unknown
136 Likes
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The thirst people have because they want a Valentine.
Unknown
256 Likes
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After valentines day guess what? Cuffing season is over! Everybody is going to be breaking up once it gets warm.
Unknown
96 Likes
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I saved a bunch of money on Valentines Day by switching to...single.
Unknown
128 Likes
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Happy Valentines Day. If you don't have that special someone and even if you do, go and spoil your momma!
Unknown
81 Likes
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Being fat is nature's way of saying, You're so good, I think I'll make more of you!
Unknown
422 Likes
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When I exercise, I wear all black. It's like a funeral for my fat.
Unknown
137 Likes
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And the thing about my jokes is, they don't hurt anybody. You can take 'em or leave 'em - you can say they're funny or they're terrible or they're good, or whatever, but you can just pass 'em by. But with Congress, every time they make a joke, it's a law! And every time they make a law, it's a joke!
Will Rogers
206 Likes
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Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.
Robert Maynard Hutchins
77 Likes
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