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Irma Bombeck On Getting Older Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Irma Bombeck On Getting Older" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
Erma Bombeck
35 Likes
Funny quotes
Dieting quotes
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For some of us, watching a miniseries that lasts longer than most marriages is not easy.
Erma Bombeck
0 Likes
Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments.
Erma Bombeck
5 Likes
Automobiles quotes
Getting out of the hospital is a lot like resigning from a book club. You're not out of it until the computer says you're out of it.
Erma Bombeck
13 Likes
You love everything don't ya, but ya know what, as you get older, the things you love so much might not seem so special anymore. Like your jack-in-the-box, maybe you'll realize it's just a piece of tin and a stuffed animal. The older you get, the fewer things you really love. By the time you're my age maybe it's only one or two things, actually it might only be one.
Jeremy Renner
5 Likes
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The older theory was, marry an older man because they're more mature. But the new theory is men don't mature. Marry a younger one.
Rita Rudner
69 Likes
Funny quotes
Break Up quotes
Women, as they grow older, rely more and more on cosmetics. Men, as they grow older, rely more and more on a sense of humor.
George Jean Nathan
6 Likes
Humor quotes
Why would anyone steal a shopping cart? It's like stealing a two-year-old.
Erma Bombeck
4 Likes
Funny quotes
Theft quotes
A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.
Erma Bombeck
13 Likes
The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
Erma Bombeck
49 Likes
Sex quotes
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Anybody who watches three games of football in a row should be declared brain dead.
Erma Bombeck
1 Likes
House guests should be regarded as perishables: Leave them out too long and they go bad.
Erma Bombeck
1 Likes
Who in their infinite wisdom decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother.
Erma Bombeck
7 Likes
vThere is nothing more miserable in the world than to arrive in paradise and look like your passport photo.
Erma Bombeck
5 Likes
Somewhere it is written that parents who are critical of other people's children and publicly admit they can do better are asking for it.
Erma Bombeck
9 Likes
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I was too old for a paper route, too young for Social Security and too tired for an affair.
Erma Bombeck
8 Likes
I will buy any creme, cosmetic, or elixir from a woman with a European accent.
Erma Bombeck
3 Likes
In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced in television.
Erma Bombeck
5 Likes
The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
Erma Bombeck
11 Likes
Funny quotes
Running quotes
In two decades I've lost a total of 789 pounds. I should be hanging from a charm bracelet.
Erma Bombeck
5 Likes
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