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Make Up Status Funny Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Make Up Status Funny" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
Hopefully one day your life will be as cool as you make it appear on Facebook.
Unknown
595 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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I dont make enough money to go on vacation, so I'm just going to get drunk this weekend until I dont know where I am.
Unknown
382 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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The greatest thing about Facebook, is that you can quote something and totally make up the source.
Saket Narayan
285 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
Unknown
348 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period.
Unknown
1251 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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'Are you as bored as I am?' Makes sense even when you read it backwards...
Unknown
1246 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Just because I like your Facebook status does not mean I want to sleep, date, or hangout with you...
Oketa Ojok
8034 Likes
Humor quotes
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Allowing gay marriages isn't nearly the gayest thing about California.
Unknown
40 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Admit it, at least once in our life we have all tried to balance the light switch between the on and off position.
Unknown
4765 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Clever Facebook Status quotes
I've had a horribly busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide.
Unknown
85 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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If people could read my mind, I'd get punched in the face a lot.
Unknown
1748 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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How am I supposed to make life choices when I still use my fingers to count and sing the whole alphabet to see what letter comes next?
Unknown
730 Likes
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Behind every great woman, there is a guy looking at her ass.
Unknown
573 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Sorry you're upset that three brutal murders by one of your players may impact your team's playoff chances.
Unknown
25 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
I read something the other day that made me piss myself. It was a sign that said: 'Bathroom closed.'
Unknown
572 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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The Miami Heat playing the San Antonio Spurs is the only way I could ever root for anything from Texas.
Unknown
41 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Facebook Status quotes
Let's all pretend we're shocked that a professional football player committed sociopathic violence.
Unknown
57 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
I refuse to go bungee jumping, I came into this world because of a broken rubber, I'm not leaving because of one.
Unknown
664 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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These animal crackers are bullshit, this elephant tastes exactly like the giraffe did.
Unknown
593 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Not to name names, but I know some of you update your status from your phone so it appears like you actually left the house. -Sent from my iPhone
Unknown
3034 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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