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Philip Philips Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Philip Philips" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky, but there wasn't any gum under any of them.
Emo Philips
3 Likes
Luck quotes
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My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' heads, where they are safe.
Emo Philips
6 Likes
The way I understand it, the Russians are sort of a combination of evil and incompetence... sort of like the Post Office with tanks.
Emo Philips
3 Likes
At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote.
Emo Philips
6 Likes
Computers aren't intelligent, they only think they are
Emo Philips
2 Likes
Computers quotes
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I was walking down fifth avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna keep it, rather than return it, but I thought: well, if I lost a hundred and fifty dollars, how would I feel? And I realized I would want to be taught a lesson.
Emo Philips
12 Likes
New York's such a wonderful city. Although I was at the library today. The guys are very rude. I said, "I'd like a card." He says, "You have to prove you're a citizen of New York." So I stabbed him.
Emo Philips
16 Likes
Funny quotes
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
Emo Philips
57 Likes
Schools quotes
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
Emo Philips
85 Likes
Women quotes
Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they're the devil.
Emo Philips
7 Likes
Time quotes
Murder quotes
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You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
Emo Philips
67 Likes
Money quotes
Nothing, like something, happens anywhere.
Philip Larkin
0 Likes
I'm about four skysc....rs behind.
Philip Johnson
2 Likes
Sup nation!?
Philip DeFranco
4 Likes
It got so ridiculous that I was like, there's no way this is going to last.
Philip J Kaplan
0 Likes
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Freedom is never given; it is won.
A Philip Randolph
11 Likes
Either I will find a way, or I will make one.
Philip Sidney
2 Likes
He that would govern others, first should be Master of himself.
Philip Massinger
4 Likes
Everything has a meaning, if only we could read it.
Philip Pullman
13 Likes
All architects want to live beyond their deaths.
Philip Johnson
3 Likes
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