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Showing search results for "Status Reports" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
How much cocaine does Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men...
Unknown
475 Likes
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How do homeless people always seem to get the shopping cart that has all four good wheels?
Unknown
353 Likes
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A multi-polar world can not exist without recognising the status and participation of developing countries.
Li Peng
2 Likes
My cat raps. His name? Wiska lifa.
Unknown
238 Likes
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What if Men In Black was really real, but we just cant remember because weve all been neutralized?
Unknown
28 Likes
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Waffles are just pancakes with syrup traps...
Unknown
86 Likes
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The only thing I gained from 2012 was weight.
Unknown
79 Likes
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They should have cellphone chargers in waiting rooms instead of magazines.
Unknown
137 Likes
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It's 2012 and we still don't have a toothpaste that doesn't ruin orange juice.
Unknown
94 Likes
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I want to have 3 kids and name them Ctrl, Alt and Delete. Then if they fu.. up I will just hit them all at once.
Unknown
496 Likes
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Ignoring somebodys text and then posting a Facebook status on purpose....Thug life.
Unknown
141 Likes
I'm not saying she was stupid, but I asked her how to spell Mississippi and she said 'the river or the state?'
Unknown
521 Likes
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My wife said she wanted something that went from 0 to 400 in 2 seconds....I got her a bathroom scale.
Unknown
472 Likes
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So I got gas yesterday for $1.39! Too bad it was only from Taco Bell.
Unknown
282 Likes
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Who else sneaks in their own candy to the movie theater? 10$ for a bag of Skittles, no thanks.
Unknown
100 Likes
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Advice for the day: If you have a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: Take two, and KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN.
Unknown
128 Likes
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You think youre pretty smart until you have to figure out how to turn on someone elses shower.
Unknown
46 Likes
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For our part, the U.S. must act quickly to ensure Most Favored Nation status to China.
Jennifer Dunn
10 Likes
I want the type of relationship that Rick Ross has with his refrigerator.
Unknown
221 Likes
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A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic.
Unknown
37 Likes
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