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Super Funny Status Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Super Funny Status" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like. It was born 15 minutes ago, it looks like a potato.
Unknown
588 Likes
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Always take your drivers license pic STONED, that way whenever you get pulled over, the cop will think you always look like that.
Unknown
451 Likes
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Online dating is now like eating at Denny's thanks to photoshop, in person your order looks nothing like the photo on the menu.
Unknown
306 Likes
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They should name hurricanes with black people names. I'd be terrified of hurricane Shanaynay.
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307 Likes
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Just saw a homeless guy sleeping in a box and it was surrounded by bubble wrap. It must be his alarm system.
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145 Likes
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Whoever said white men can't jump has clearly never played Temple Run.
Unknown
220 Likes
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I'm not saying she's a slut but whenever she eats a banana in public, she puts one hand behind her head.
Unknown
297 Likes
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Never in my life have I seen a tombstone that read: Died for not forwarding that text to 10 people.
Unknown
475 Likes
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Opening your cabinet, seeing there's about to be an avalanche of stuff falling, and quickly closing it for the next person to deal with.
Unknown
567 Likes
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I wish our s.. life was as passionate as your reaction to the casting news about Fifty Shades of Grey.
Unknown
67 Likes
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I wish Google maps had an, 'Avoid The Ghetto Route' option.
Unknown
230 Likes
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I think car horns should sound like gun shots....I bet you'll move then.
Unknown
168 Likes
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Sorry the casting of Fifty Shades of Grey has caused you to completely revamp your mastur...... fantasies.
Unknown
63 Likes
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Rick Ross shirts be looking like a sheet from a King size bed!
Unknown
120 Likes
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I'm not saying she's a slut, but I tried to put her name as my password and it said 'Error: too easy.'
Unknown
722 Likes
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I stepped on a cornflake this morning...I'm a cereal killer now!
Unknown
294 Likes
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I'm trying to prove everybody wrong whoever told me I couldn't make it. To all the haters who say I can't rap and I will never make it. I'm going to show them. And plus I make music for the crowd to dance and get crunk too. I make my tracks from the heart. And I think I'm bringing that new "SUPER FRESH" style to the game that don't nobody got yet. I see they snappin and dancing. But I got that "SUPER FRESH" style to top it off. So I'm coming just watch me!
Soulja Boy
5 Likes
The problem is, obesity runs in our family. No, the problem is no-one runs in your family...
Unknown
585 Likes
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That awkward moment, when you're walking through the metal detector and your abs of steel set it off.
Unknown
436 Likes
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My Lesbian neighbors asked me what I wanted for my Birthday. They gave me a Rolex. I think they misunderstood when I said "I wanna watch."
Unknown
1197 Likes
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