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Johnny Carson Birthdays Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Johnny Carson Birthdays" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
Carson is an old family name, though my grandma used to watch Johnny all the time and was crazy about him.
Carson Daly
8 Likes
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Never use a big word when a little filthy one will do.
Johnny Carson
0 Likes
I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.
Johnny Carson
3 Likes
We're more effective than birth control pills.
Johnny Carson
2 Likes
People will pay more to be entertained than educated.
Johnny Carson
2 Likes
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I cried when I heard Johnny Carson died.
Victoria Jackson
1 Likes
Johnny Carson started the jokes about me and Marlin in his monologues.
Jim Fowler
4 Likes
If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.
Johnny Carson
3 Likes
New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time, most unsolved.
Johnny Carson
2 Likes
There really is no Johnny Carson anymore. There is no one place a comedian can appear and explode.
Tom Leykis
0 Likes
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I know you've been married to the same woman for 69 years. That is marvelous. It must be very inexpensive.
Johnny Carson
1 Likes
Marriage quotes
According to Johnny Carson, I was the guy who Marlon sent out to do all the dirty work.
Jim Fowler
0 Likes
If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.
Johnny Carson
2 Likes
Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place.
Johnny Carson
5 Likes
Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.
Johnny Carson
1 Likes
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It's funny, I remember doing the Johnny Carson show, and, uh, I couldn't afford my rent.
Natalie Merchant
0 Likes
Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.
Johnny Carson
23 Likes
Funny quotes
Get Well quotes
For days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone calls taper off.
Johnny Carson
6 Likes
I remember Johnny Carson laughing effusively when I made my 'Tonight' show debut in the early 1970's as part of a sketch comedy group called the Ace Trucking Company. We didn't even have a name when we first did the show, but one of my favorite moments was looking over to see him laughing, falling off his chair. This was topped only by another kind of tribute often paid by Johnny: imitation. We did a sketch about tough motorcyclists stopping into a shop and demanding sho.. and coming away with handbags and ruffled blouses and stuff, and after it was over, Johnny kept saying, 'I want some sho..,' like one of the characters, and that was just a kind of salute. To have him pick up a catchphrase and repeat it was just amazing.
Fred Willard
17 Likes
Mail your packages early so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas.
Johnny Carson
8 Likes
Sarcastic Life quotes
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