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Alarm Clock Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Alarm Clock Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I'd rather laugh in bed than do it. If I went to a lady of the night, I'd probably pay her to tell me jokes. Would that be perverted?
Billy Joel
16 Likes
Jokes quotes
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To all those who said I couldn't make jokes about blind people...watch me.
Unknown
73 Likes
Facebook Status quotes
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I hate cripple jokes. I can't stand them.
Unknown
336 Likes
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If my jokes offend you: 1. Im sorry. 2. It wont happen again. 3. 1 & 2 are lies. and 4. get over it.
Unknown
124 Likes
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A book does not make bad jokes, drink too much or eat more than you can afford to pay for.
Kenneth Turan
129 Likes
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9/11 jokes aren't funny, they're just plane wrong.
Unknown
220 Likes
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Family jokes, through rightly cursed by strangers, are the bond that keeps most families alive.
Stella Benson
20 Likes
Jokes quotes
Family jokes, through rightly cursed by strangers, are the bond that keeps most families alive
Stella Benson
5 Likes
Jokes quotes
You make jokes because you're afraid to take anything seriously, because if you take things seriously, they matter.
Unknown
18 Likes
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Most jokes state a bitter truth.
Larry Gelbart
30 Likes
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Most jokes state a bitter truth
Larry Gelbart
7 Likes
Jokes quotes
There are some good people. But a good chunk of them will lie for no reason at all - it'll be ten o'clock and they'll tell you it's nine. You're looking at the clock and you can't even fathom why they're lying. They just lie because that's what they do.
John Cusack
4 Likes
My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' heads, where they are safe.
Emo Philips
6 Likes
Fightin back revenge You've got your face to the ground You make excuses for the madness You've been hanging around You built a house up in the trees So you could see everyone You set the clock and had a run You set the clock and had a run
Cage The Elephant
9 Likes
I would also like to act, once in a while, but not get up every morning at 5:30 or six o'clock and pound into the studio and get home at 7:30 or eight o'clock at night, or act over and over and over every night on Broadway, either.
Jackie Cooper
1 Likes
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Paint me an eternal tea-pot, for I usually drink tea from eight o'clock at night to four o'clock in the morning.
Thomas De Quincey
1 Likes
Drink quotes
Suppose the world were only one of God's jokes, would you work any the less to make it a good joke instead of a bad one?
George Bernard Shaw
354 Likes
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If you want anything done well, do it yourself. This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.
Bob Edwards
50 Likes
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The problem with political jokes is they get elected.
Unknown
371 Likes
Jokes quotes
The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.
Will Rogers
147 Likes
Jokes quotes
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