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Funny 54th Birthdaye Evening Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny 54th Birthdaye Evening" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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My parents told me 'You watch too much TV and should try reading more!' So I turned on the subtitles.
Unknown
929 Likes
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Its crazy because people expect you to be funny all the time and every day is not a funny day. I go to funerals and people are like 'tell a joke' and 'say one of your lines in a movie.' ITS A FUNERAL MAN!
Chris Tucker
34 Likes
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A man commented to his lunch companion: My wife had a funny dream last night. She dreamed she'd married a millionaire. You're lucky, sighed the companion. My wife dreams that in the daytime.
Sam Ewing
2534 Likes
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God put haters on this earth for two reasons: 1. To motivate others. 2. To give no lives a job.
Surgeo Bell
80 Likes
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Good morning, good afternoon, good evening.
Unknown
30 Likes
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Nothing makes me want a relationship to fail more than matching profile pictures.
Unknown
461 Likes
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The word 'funny' is a bit like the word 'love' - we don't have enough words to describe the many varieties.
George Saunders
81 Likes
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I like being a funny lady. I think there's nothing s..ier than a funny lady.
Maya Rudolph
3 Likes
Let's never speak of 2013 again.
Unknown
5 Likes
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Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist. What's in that pipe that he's smoking?"
Arlo Guthrie
21 Likes
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Roses are reddish, Violets are bluish, If it werent for Christmas, Wed all be Jewish.
Benny Hill
92 Likes
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Dear Santa, what I want for Christmas is... your list with names of naughty girls.
Unknown
693 Likes
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Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.
Victor Borge
25 Likes
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I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.
Unknown
137 Likes
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The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
George Carlin
85 Likes
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Perhaps it is our perennial fate to be surprised by the simultaneity of events, by the sheer extension of the world in time and space. That we are here, prosperous, safe, unlikely to go to bed hungry or be blown to pieces this evening, while elsewhere in the world, right now in Grozny, in Najaf, in the Sudan, in the Congo, in Gaza, in the favelas of Rio.... To be a travelerand novelists are often travelersis to be constantly reminded of the simultaneity of what is going on in the world, your world and the very different world you have visited and from which you have returned home.
Susan Sontag
4 Likes
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What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
Phyllis Diller
42 Likes
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Thanks for inviting me to a New Year's party I'll have no recollection of attending.
Unknown
10 Likes
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This year let's resolve to make better bad decisions.
Unknown
30 Likes
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Having fun in the sun, getting laid in the shade, summer's here...
Unknown
40 Likes
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