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Funny Dirty Facebook Statusumpti Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Dirty Facebook Statusumpti" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I don't see why everybody wants a white iPhone. Everyone knows the black one runs faster.
Unknown
575 Likes
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On a scale from Kristen Stewart to Nicki Minaj, how many different facial expressions do you have?
Unknown
264 Likes
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When I kill a bug in my house, I leave the dead body around for a bit to warn the others.
Unknown
436 Likes
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If you can't afford po.., just turn on women's tennis and shut your eyes...
Unknown
371 Likes
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If you don't have an iPhone I feel bad for you, son. I got 99 Emojis & you can't see none.
Unknown
187 Likes
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Thanks for inviting me to your baby shower, it reminded me to take my birth control pill.
Unknown
205 Likes
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Whats the worst thing to do to a blind person? Leave the plunger in the toilet.
Unknown
327 Likes
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Am I on facebook because I'm bored, or am bored because I'm on facebook?
Unknown
469 Likes
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If your relationship is so complicated that you have to specify it as such on Facebook, you should get off Facebook and fix it.
Unknown
143 Likes
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The real trouble with reality is that there's no background music.
Unknown
960 Likes
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I guess it's hard to tune in and know what's going on...because there's about 10 storylines going at one time. So if people haven't seen the show and they just jump in and try to watch it's easy to get confused. But at the same time I think it's easy for anyone to tune in and enjoy it. I mean, it's just a really dirty show. There are a lot of dir.. jokes.
Michael Cera
37 Likes
The best sign of a healthy relationship is no sign of it on Facebook.
Johnneil Bertrand
505 Likes
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I'm not saying she's a slut, but I tried to put her name as my password and it said 'Error: too easy.'
Unknown
722 Likes
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Online dating is now like eating at Denny's thanks to photoshop, in person your order looks nothing like the photo on the menu.
Unknown
306 Likes
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Our sincere condolences to the next woman Michael Douglas gives Catherine Zeta-Jones' HPV to.
Unknown
26 Likes
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Closing all the internet windows by the time your boss gets to your desk is like getting the keys into the door before the killer gets you.
Unknown
841 Likes
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Dear Internet Users, Someday u will regret not reading me. Sincerely, Terms & Conditions.
Unknown
1055 Likes
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They should name hurricanes with black people names. I'd be terrified of hurricane Shanaynay.
Unknown
307 Likes
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Ever looked back at your ex and asked yourself was I drunk the entire relationship?
Unknown
349 Likes
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I surveyed 100 women and asked them what shampoo they used when showering, 98 of them said: How the hell did you get in here?
Nikhil Saluja
208 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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