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Funny Government Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Government Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
The Government does not intend these things to happen, the Commission on whose report the Bill was founded did not intend these things to happen, but in legislation intention is nothing, and the letter of the law everything, and no government has the
William Butler Yeats
0 Likes
Government quotes
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Big news on CNN, a search has uncovered illegal biochemical agents, toxins and other dangerous substances. Not in Iraq, in Rush Limbaugh's medicine cabinet.
Jay Leno
26 Likes
Funny quotes
Government quotes
Government is at best but an expedient; but most governments are usually, and all governments are sometimes, inexpedient. The objections which have been brought against a standing army, and they are many and weighty, and deserve to prevail, may also at last be brought against a standing government.
Henry David Thoreau
3 Likes
Government quotes
So you wanna hear a joke, its not funny so you wont laugh, so there are three tomatoes walking down the street mamma tomato pappa tomato and baby tomato, so baby tomato starts lagging behind and pappa tomato gets mad and goes back and squashes baby tomato and says ketchup.
Pulp Fiction
44 Likes
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A good government implies two things: fidelity to the object of government, which is the happiness of the people; secondly, a knowledge of the means by which that object can be best attained
James Madison
4 Likes
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Bush gave an interview and he said people will vote for him because 'They've seen me weep, theyve seen me laugh, and theyve seen me hug.' These are the same qualifications for a Tickle Me Elmo.
Bill Maher
23 Likes
Funny quotes
Government quotes
Many people consider the things which government does for them to be social progress, but they consider the things government does for others as socialism.
Earl Warren
2 Likes
Government quotes
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Many people want the government to protect the consumer. A much more urgent problem is to protect the consumer from the government.
Milton Friedman
11 Likes
Government quotes
Many people say that government is necessary because some men cannot be trusted to look after themselves, but anarchists say that government is harmful because no men can be trusted to look after anyone else.
Nicolas Walter
6 Likes
Government quotes
It may be true that you can't fool all the people all the time, but you can fool enough of them to rule a large country.
Will Durant
29 Likes
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What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck.
Anonymous
102 Likes
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It is just as important that business keep out of government as that government keep out of business.
Herbert Hoover
5 Likes
Government quotes
Today the nations of the world may be divided into two classes - the nations in which the government fears the people, and the nations in which the people fear the government.
Unknown
2 Likes
Government quotes
An English professor wrote the words, "Woman without her man is nothing" on the blackboard and directed his students to punctuate it correctly. The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing." The women wrote: "Woman: Without her, man is nothing."
Unknown
1496 Likes
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The Republican form of government is the highest form of government: but because of this it requires the highest type of human nature - a type nowhere at present existing.
Herbert Spencer
3 Likes
Government quotes
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Electronic calculators can solve problems which the man who made them cannot solve; but no government subsidised commission of engineers and physicists could create a worm.
Joseph Wood Krutch
58 Likes
Funny quotes
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I moved to New York to do theater, and I got cast in a play that was funny, and then I was the funny guy. I did a movie that was funny, and then I was the funny guy.
Steve Zahn
1 Likes
Food, love, career, and mother, the four major guilt groups.
Unknown
32 Likes
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Sure there are dishonest men in local government. But there are dishonest men in national government too.
Richard M Nixon
1 Likes
Government quotes
Government must help to eliminate cars so that bicycles can help to eliminate government.
Advocacy Slogan In Holland
358 Likes
Bicycles quotes
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