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Funny Put Downistant Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Put Downistant" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I feel lazy. In fact, I'm feeling lazier than the guy who drew the Japanese flag.
Unknown
164 Likes
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Lets attend an opulent New Year's Eve party so we can briefly ignore the horror of our impending poverty.
Unknown
6 Likes
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Confucius says Love one another. If it doesn't work, just interchange the last two words.
Hussein Nishah
554 Likes
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On the 12th Day of Christmas my Facebook gave to me, 12 dudes I'm blocking, 11 friends just watching, 10 corny topics, 9 busted barbies, 8 friends complaining, 7 stalkers stalking, 6 party invites, Fiiiiiiiiiiiiive Drama Queeeensssss, 4 game requests, 3 photo tags, 2 friends-a-pokin & a creep who won't stop inboxing meeee!
Unknown
1205 Likes
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Seeing the irresponsibly dangerous stunts in the Spider-Man musical has prepared me for your New Year's behavior.
Unknown
8 Likes
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If you're a dude and it takes more than 20 seconds to take of your jeans because it's tight,You Gay !
Boat_Grandberry
51 Likes
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Behind every successful student, there is a deactivated Facebook account.
Unknown
948 Likes
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Life is not a garden, don't be a hoe.
Unknown
1840 Likes
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I hope the world ends in 2012 so I can't be held accountable for my New Year's resolutions.
Unknown
15 Likes
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Well hello, Mr. Hoodie. It has been a while since I needed to wear you. Hope you had a relaxing summer...now its back to work for you!
Unknown
35 Likes
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Gaining 20 lbs over the holidays makes your New Year's resolution of losing 10 less impressive.
Unknown
8 Likes
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I could be a morning person. If morning happened to be around noon.
Unknown
248 Likes
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Ok summer I'm sorry for bad mouthing you bout being so hot, can you come back?? Its freakin cold!
Unknown
68 Likes
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Let's decide which champagne we're going to barf.
Unknown
4 Likes
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There was one thing where David Cross was doing a scene and he was showing me his cutoff shorts and he throws them at my chest. And he had to stop throwing them at my chest because every time he did I started laughing. And it was so funny. It would have been so funny on the show but it's not even on the show anymore because I couldn't do it without laughing. He would just hurl the shorts into my chest. I robbed all the viewers of a funny thing because I couldn't stop laughing.
Michael Cera
3 Likes
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Sorry you're finally mature enough to just want a quiet evening with friends on New Year's Eve.
Unknown
9 Likes
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It's harder to be funny if you're handsome than if you're very normal-looking. It's just more relatable. You're the underdog. I mean it's funny to see people struggle, and you don't buy that Brad Pitt is struggling, you know that guy could be the most skill-less guy in the world, but if you look like that you will be fine for the rest of your life.
Jonah Hill
11 Likes
The law of God, as quite plainly expressed in woman's construction, is this: There shall be no limit put upon your intercourse with the other s.. s..ually, at any time of life. During twenty-three days in every month (in the absence of pregnancy) from the time a woman is seven years old till she dies of old age, she is ready for action, and competent. As competent as the candlestick is to receive the candle. Competent every day, competent every night. Also, she wants that candle yearns for it, longs for it, hankers after it, as commanded by the law of God in her heart.
Mark Twain
17 Likes
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I don't go tanning anymore because Obama put a 10 percent tax on tanning. McCain would never put a 10 percent tax on tanning. Because he's pale and would probably want to be tan.
Nicole Polizzi
3 Likes
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As we sink deeper into the ways of this world, we put more and more distance between ourselves and God. The more distance we put between ourselves and God, the harder and harder it is to maintain His intended love in our lives.
Andrew Cervantes
24 Likes
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