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Funny Stoned Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Stoned" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
Will Rogers
2276 Likes
Funny quotes
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what, I got to amit this is some funny shit!!!
Miranda :)
30 Likes
Funny Redneck quotes
I think I'm funny because my family, my siblings were funny.
Martin Short
14 Likes
It's not about trying to be funny all the time. It's more of a document that hopefully is funny.
David Cross
2 Likes
I do jokes about what's funny, and both sides are funny.
Mark Russell
3 Likes
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If it bends, it's funny; if it breaks, it's not funny.
Kate O'Brien
0 Likes
I never thought I was funny, but I enjoy being funny.
Nora Dunn
14 Likes
My New Year's resolution is to stop hanging out with people who ask me about my New Year's resolutions.
Unknown
52 Likes
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That awkward moment when you're checking yourself out in the window of another car and realize there's someone inside.
Unknown
631 Likes
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Parent: What did you learn today? Student: Apparently not enough! We have to go back tomorrow!
Unknown
1256 Likes
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I just wanna be rich enough to have Morgan Freeman read me bedtime stories.
Unknown
255 Likes
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I accidentally bumped into my ex today...With my car...at 60mph...on purpose.
Unknown
933 Likes
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It's been said good things come to those who wait... All I have to say is whatever is coming to me,better be freaking fantastic!
Nishan Panwar
547 Likes
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It's funny, when people talk about the 70s I can tell you the year of every album but when it comes to the later efforts I can't remember the exact years, it's funny isn't it?
Steve Hackett
9 Likes
My wife is funny. And I dabble in it. So being funny is big around our house. But what's surprised me is my daughter can do an English accent. I don't know how she learned this.
Jerry Seinfeld
6 Likes
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Relationships are like fat people, most of them don't work out.
Unknown
2419 Likes
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Taylor Swift seems like the type of chick that would poke a hole in a condom.
Unknown
340 Likes
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My alarm clock is clearly jealous of my amazing relationship with my bed.
Unknown
2332 Likes
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When my girlfriend and I fight, I tighten the top to every jar and bottle in the house. Just so I can say "Oh yeah, you need me NOW, huh?"
Unknown
1346 Likes
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Sometimes, when my underwear matches my outfit, it makes me feel like I really have my life together.
Unknown
281 Likes
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