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Good Night Funny Facebook Statuscebook S Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Good Night Funny Facebook Statuscebook S" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I want the type of relationship that Rick Ross has with his refrigerator.
Unknown
221 Likes
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I can't believe it's 2012 and there is still no fold button on my dryer.
Unknown
81 Likes
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China is only winning the Olympics because they made all the equipment...
Unknown
398 Likes
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3 Jobs that changed the world: Hand, Blow and Steve.
Unknown
28 Likes
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I have a memory foam mattress...and I really hope that it doesn't remember everything.
Unknown
349 Likes
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Don't steal, don't lie, don't cheat, don't sell drugs. The government hates competition.
Hussein Nishah
526 Likes
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A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
Unknown
33 Likes
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A day without sunshine is like, night.
Unknown
8 Likes
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I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator.
Emo Philips
47 Likes
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There should be a rule against people trying to be funny before the sun comes up.
Kristen Chandler
262 Likes
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I dont make enough money to go on vacation, so I'm just going to get drunk this weekend until I dont know where I am.
Unknown
382 Likes
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Oh, it's sunny outside. I better update my Facebook status for all of my friends that don't have windows.
Unknown
3329 Likes
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A drunken man was dreaming that he died and reincarnated on earth as a chicken. He became heavy and tried to lay an egg! He pushed and pushed and laid the 1st egg, then the 2nd. He was pushing to lay a 3rd egg when his wife screamed ''James! You're shitting on the bed!"
Unknown
604 Likes
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I'm pretty sure I have a defective iphone 5, I keep pressing the home button and I'm still at work.
Unknown
264 Likes
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I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.
Unknown
1223 Likes
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No I didnt trip The floor looked like it needed a hug.
Unknown
2505 Likes
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That awkward moment when people start stuff on your Facebook status and you just don't want to get involved.
Unknown
154 Likes
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Hurricanes are like women: when they come, they're wet and wild, but when they leave they take your house and car.
Unknown
540 Likes
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Wanna hear a joke about my pe..s? Never mind, it's too long.
Unknown
3462 Likes
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Got in a wreck with a smart car today, its totaled. My bike is fine though.
Unknown
308 Likes
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