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Openng Line Funny Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Openng Line Funny" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Dear Santa, ( ) I've been good all year. ( ) Ok most of the time. ( ) Once in a while. (X) fu.. it. I'll buy my own shit.
Unknown
917 Likes
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My resolution is to spend more time avoiding friends and family.
Unknown
25 Likes
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I hope one of your New Year's resolutions is to stop tagging me in New Year's photos.
Unknown
39 Likes
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My resolution is to spend less time working which means you'll have to work more.
Unknown
8 Likes
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For my new year's resolution, I promise to stop correcting your terrible spelling and focus more on your horrific grammar.
Unknown
20 Likes
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My resolution is to get healthier while still destroying myself with alcohol and drugs.
Unknown
21 Likes
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Sorry that, statistically speaking, you probably won't fulfill your resolution.
Unknown
8 Likes
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Funny is funny is funny.
Bob Newhart
0 Likes
I love funny people, and when I'm with funny people, or people who are amusing in their weirdness, I love it. Because that to me is funny, as opposed to someone who stops and says, 'Hey let me tell you a joke.'
Paul Feig
6 Likes
My excuses for already failing my New Year's resolution are more complicated than the fiscal cliff deal.
Unknown
22 Likes
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Mom: Your great aunt just passed away. LOL Me: Why is that funny? Mom: It's not funny David! What do you mean? Me: Mom lol means laughing out loud! Mom: Oh my goodness! I sent that to everyone I thought it meant lots of love. I have to call everyone back oh God.
Unknown
800 Likes
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Long quotes
They say theres a fine line between genius and insanity. If a man thinks he can write, does that make him genius or insane for trying. I ask myself, are we born with talent, or is talent created in us? I guess not all of us are naturally gifted or talented. I assume that gifts or talents would have to be built with practice, dedication and commitment. They say put your heart into it but what about your soul? Is compassion or lust for grammar and written word a sin? I dont know. Does it make me mad with insanity? Sometimes. The pen is an instrument of the mind; only through it will my thoughts find relief. So they say theres a fine line between genius and insanity. Which one am I, at this time I dont really know; which one am I?
John Miller
21 Likes
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The reason why most video games movies havent been successful up until now is the fact that most of the action that takes place is stuff that weve seen before [in the game], but hasnt had a reason in the story line that makes sense. So, in this movie we decided that everything the prince did in the movie had to have a reason. If he were going to jump on a wall and run over to get away from somebody, or hes going to jump from building to building, there had to be an obstacle. It had to be based on something that he had learned, or based in the story line. Most of the time you just see really cool stunts and people doing really cool things, but you dont know why. Our action all ties back into the ultimate story.
Jake Gyllenhaal
8 Likes
There should be a rule against people trying to be funny before the sun comes up.
Kristen Chandler
262 Likes
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The awkward moment when you realize your joke isn't as funny as you thought.
Unknown
224 Likes
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If this is some kind of practical joke, it's not funny, and I know funny. I'm a clownfish. -Marlin
Finding Nemo
5 Likes
Funny how I want to skip class in order to study.
Unknown
91 Likes
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If you tell the truth about how youre feeling, it becomes funny.
Larry David
42 Likes
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I'm always more motivated by the pain of a funny character than by what makes him funny.
Jason Alexander
0 Likes
When I'm with my friends I'm funny, but I don't feel like I'm a funny clown.
Nora Dunn
7 Likes
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