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Poem Written By Erma Bombeck For He Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Poem Written By Erma Bombeck For He" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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There is one thing I have never taught my body how to do and that is to figure out at 6 A.M. what it wants to eat at 6 P.M.
Erma Bombeck
2 Likes
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For some of us, watching a miniseries that lasts longer than most marriages is not easy.
Erma Bombeck
0 Likes
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
Erma Bombeck
35 Likes
Funny quotes
Dieting quotes
Getting out of the hospital is a lot like resigning from a book club. You're not out of it until the computer says you're out of it.
Erma Bombeck
13 Likes
Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments.
Erma Bombeck
5 Likes
Automobiles quotes
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Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time.
Erma Bombeck
1 Likes
It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
Erma Bombeck
4 Likes
In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced in television.
Erma Bombeck
5 Likes
House guests should be regarded as perishables: Leave them out too long and they go bad.
Erma Bombeck
1 Likes
I was too old for a paper route, too young for Social Security and too tired for an affair.
Erma Bombeck
8 Likes
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The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
Erma Bombeck
11 Likes
Funny quotes
Running quotes
I will buy any creme, cosmetic, or elixir from a woman with a European accent.
Erma Bombeck
3 Likes
vThere is nothing more miserable in the world than to arrive in paradise and look like your passport photo.
Erma Bombeck
5 Likes
The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
Erma Bombeck
49 Likes
Sex quotes
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A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.
Erma Bombeck
13 Likes
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Who in their infinite wisdom decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother.
Erma Bombeck
7 Likes
Why would anyone steal a shopping cart? It's like stealing a two-year-old.
Erma Bombeck
4 Likes
Funny quotes
Theft quotes
Anybody who watches three games of football in a row should be declared brain dead.
Erma Bombeck
1 Likes
In two decades I've lost a total of 789 pounds. I should be hanging from a charm bracelet.
Erma Bombeck
5 Likes
What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere?
Erma Bombeck
6 Likes
Direction quotes
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