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Dave Allen Funny Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Dave Allen Funny" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.
Fred Allen
37 Likes
Funny quotes
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The baby is fine. The only problem is that he looks like Edward G. Robinson.
Woody Allen
5 Likes
Funny quotes
Children quotes
If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job
Woody Allen
1 Likes
Funny quotes
Movies quotes
If my films make one more person miserable, I'll feel I have done my job.
Woody Allen
22 Likes
Funny quotes
When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.
Gracie Allen
6 Likes
Birth quotes
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When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.
Gracie Allen
14 Likes
Funny quotes
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Dave! Relax! Close your buttcheeks!
Dave Chappelle
25 Likes
My fans are buying the DNA of Dave.
Dave Pelzer
3 Likes
It's funny how a hello is always accompanied with a goodbye. It's funny how good memories can make you cry, it's funny how forever never seems to last, it's funny how much you would lose if you forgot about your past, it's funny how friends can just leave when you're down, it's funny how when you need someone they never are around, it's funny how people change and think they're so much better, it's funny how some many lies are packed into one love letter, it's funny how one night can hold so much regret, it's funny how you can forgive but not forget, it's funny how ironic life turns out to be, but the funniest part of all, is that none of that is funny to me.
Unknown
565 Likes
Funny quotes
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Ive had enough of being me. Ive had enough of being Lily Allen, I want to be me now. Whatever situation Im in, whether its going to the supermarket, the pub or a club, or in the back of a cab, people think they know me. And the reality is they dont. Lily Allen is a character I have no control over. Ive got nothing to do with it except my face is the one that goes with it.
Lily Allen
15 Likes
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But it's funny that now I'm in such a happy situation, I look more objectively at my own past and see what others have seen for a long time and I'm just so glad I've been able to get to this point.
Rick Allen
9 Likes
My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.
Woody Allen
25 Likes
Funny quotes
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I took the speed reading course and read 'War and Peace' in twenty minutes. It's about Russia.
Woody Allen
13 Likes
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In Beverly Hills...they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.
Woody Allen
13 Likes
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Today, the L.A. Times accused Arnold Schwarzenegger of groping six women. I'm telling you, this guy is presidential material.
Dave Letterman
22 Likes
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Humans are the only animal who can have s.. over the phone.
Dave Letterman
771 Likes
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The Internet: Transforming Society and Shaping the Future Through Chat
Dave Barry
6 Likes
Funny quotes
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You can say any fool thing to a dog, and the dog will give you this look that says, `My God, you're RIGHT! I NEVER would've thought of that!'
Dave Barry
11 Likes
Funny quotes
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You can say any fool thing to a dog, and the dog will give you this look that says, `My God, you're RIGHT! I NEVER would've thought of that!'
Dave Barry
20 Likes
Funny quotes
Pets quotes
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Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro.
Dave Barry
18 Likes
Teenage quotes
Funny quotes
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