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Funny Elf Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Elf Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I wouldn't say I was a queen. Maybe a little elf.
Parker Posey
3 Likes
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I've been doing the Fonda workout: the Peter Fonda workout. That's where I wake up, take a hit of acid, smoke a joint, and run to my sister's house and ask her for money.
Kevin Meaney
175 Likes
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If the 2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still 2?
Unknown
224 Likes
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So I went to the dentist. He said Say Aaah. I said Why? He said My dog's died.'
Tim Vine
18 Likes
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You look like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Unknown
498 Likes
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How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
Spike Milligan
16 Likes
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Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side got cut off? He's all right now.
Unknown
52 Likes
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I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
Groucho Marx
23 Likes
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Sometimes we have to actually say, I think you're really funny, but none of your jokes are going to make it on the air. So just answer my questions. Seriously.
Rob Corddry
11 Likes
Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
Mark Twain
50 Likes
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Hi. Um, my camel called...he wants his toe back!
Unknown
59 Likes
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What do you call a fake noodle??? An impasta.
Unknown
172 Likes
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Lebron: I'm proposing to my girl. Kobe: With what?
Unknown
142 Likes
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What do you call identical boobs? Identitties.
Unknown
110 Likes
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I used to like my neighbours, until they put a password on their Wi-Fi.
Unknown
618 Likes
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I get spotted now and again. Some people say, 'You're that elf dude, right?'
Orlando Bloom
4 Likes
Jokes are better than war. Even the most aggressive jokes are better than the least aggressive wars. Even the longest jokes are better than the shortest wars.
George Mikes
1 Likes
I lost my coat, hopefully someone didn't jacket.
Unknown
78 Likes
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Reasons to date me: I laugh at my own jokes so you don't have to.
Amit Verma
99 Likes
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The fastest way to make your own Anti-freeze is to hide her nightgown.
Unknown
24 Likes
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