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Funny Hot Weather Jokes Jokess Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Hot Weather Jokes Jokess" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I oppose the Gay Pride Parade because it reminds me all the hot guys I want to sleep with are gay.
Unknown
14 Likes
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Marriage is a workshop, where the husband works and the wife shops.
Unknown
633 Likes
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I know we're not saints or virgins or lunatics; we know all the lust and lavatory jokes, and most of the dirty people; we can catch buses and count our change and cross the roads and talk real sentences. But our innocence goes awfully deep, and our discreditable secret is that we don't know anything at all, and our horrid inner secret is that we don't care that we don't.
Dylan Thomas
77 Likes
Jokes quotes
Though I look old, yet I am strong and lusty; for in my youth I never did apply hot and rebellious liquors in my blood; and did not, with unbashful forehead, woo the means of weakness and debility; therefore, my age is as a lusty winter, frosty but k.
William Shakespeare
18 Likes
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Being a Hot Mom means being respected as a mom and a woman. And, the key to being a Hot Mom is having a sense of humor about yourself and all the crazy situations that arise.
Jami Gertz
16 Likes
Humor quotes
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In awe I watched the waxing moon ride across the zenith of the heavens like an ambered chariot towards the ebon void of infinite space wherein the tethered belts of Jupiter and Mars hang forever festooned in their orbital majesty. And as I looked at all this I thought...I must put a roof on this lavatory.
Les Dawson
182 Likes
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Well I was bullied at school, called all kinds of different names. But one day I turned to my bullies and said - 'Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me', and it worked! From there on it was sticks and stones all the way.
Harry Hill
337 Likes
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I'm not offended by dumb blonde jokes because I know that I'm not dumb. I also know I'm not blonde.
Dolly Parton
30 Likes
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I'm not offended by dumb blonde jokes because I know that I'm not dumb. I also know I'm not blonde.
Dolly Parton
59 Likes
Jokes quotes
I don't know what humor is. Anything that's funny -- tragedy or anything, it don't make no difference so [long as] you happen to hit it just right. But there's one thing I'm proud of -- I ain't got it in for anybody. I don't like to make jokes that hurt anybody.
Will Rogers
6 Likes
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Let's protest Friendship Day by having hot, friendship-ending s...
Unknown
26 Likes
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American-style iced tea is the perfect drink for a hot, sunny day. It's never really caught on in the UK, probably because the last time we had a hot, sunny day was back in 1957.
Tom Holt
41 Likes
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The two hot issues are the gay issue and the abortion issue. These are the two defining issues in the evangelical community these days. I'm sure that these hot buttons will be pushed, time and time again.
Tony Campolo
1 Likes
I think of myself as a comedian who has the pleasure of writing jokes about things that I actually care about. And that's really it. You know, if I really wanted to enact social change I have great respect for people who are in the front lines and the trenches of trying to enact social change. I am far lazier than that.
Jon Stewart
59 Likes
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I think of myself as a comedian who has the pleasure of writing jokes about things that I actually care about. And that's really it. You know, if I really wanted to enact social change I have great respect for people who are in the front lines and the trenches of trying to enact social change. I am far lazier than that.
Jon Stewart
35 Likes
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I think of myself as a comedian who has the pleasure of writing jokes about things that I actually care about. And that's really it. You know, if I really wanted to enact social change I have great respect for people who are in the front lines and the trenches of trying to enact social change. I am far lazier than that.
Jon Stewart
19 Likes
Jokes quotes
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Cheryl Cole and Katy Perry are two of the hottest girls in the world - and so normal and funny with it. If I was a few years older they are the kind of girls I'd like to date. I want a younger version of Cheryl and Katy - a mixture of the two would be hot.
Justin Bieber
112 Likes
Attention. That's all girls want. The best gift you can give to a girl is your devotion, not some Louboutins. But buy those if you're busy, for sure.
Unknown
30 Likes
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My diabetic neighbor died in his sleep. I forgot to wish him 'sweet dreams.'
Unknown
282 Likes
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Why do single girls take advice from other single girls? That's like ray charles giving stevie wonder driving directions.
Unknown
186 Likes
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