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Funny Old People Joke Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Old People Joke" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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This Christmas I've decided to put a mistletoe in my back pocket....so all the people I dont like can kiss my ass.
Unknown
719 Likes
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Television is a medium of entertainment which permits millions of people to listen to the same joke at the same time, and yet remain lonesome.
T S Eliot
1 Likes
Entertainment quotes
People are learning to feel more comfortable hearing one another's dreams. It used to be that if you told a dream in public, someone had to make a joke to relieve the tension introduced by that alternative reality.
Henry Reed
0 Likes
What people actually think: ha = you. suck. haha = not that funny. hahaha = really funny actually. hahahaha = funniest. thing. ever!! hahahahaha = I wanna be your friend/ gf/ bf. ahahahahaha = you. suck. a. lot.
Lala
106 Likes
Facebook Haha Funny Thoughts Secrets Hate Love quotes
I hate two-faced people. It's so hard to decide which face to slap first.
Unknown
764 Likes
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What keeps me grounded is my friends and family and being able to joke around and have a sense of humor. They laugh at me about everything and I give it right back. Being able to have the sanctity of people you know and love and trust really makes you feel safe in this environment.
Leonardo DiCaprio
17 Likes
Weird people are funny. If you're just completely normal, you're boring. So I so much prefer weird people to boring people.
Bobbie
29 Likes
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There should be a rule against people trying to be funny before the sun comes up.
Kristen Chandler
262 Likes
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If you tell the truth about how youre feeling, it becomes funny.
Larry David
42 Likes
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Most of the time when people laugh at me...I'm not trying to be funny.
Donny Norris
71 Likes
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I think that every show on television has its place. I think Married With Children or, I don't know, The Nanny... some people want to go home, turn on the TV and be able to iron their clothes or grab a sandwich. Come out and catch a joke and not have to follow the story.
Peter Krause
0 Likes
If being broke is a joke then you a funny ni....
Unknown
90 Likes
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The most important thing is to write material that YOU think is funny. If you don't think it's funny, but you're convinced that other people will think it is, well they won't.
Mo Rocca
4 Likes
People always ask me, 'Were you funny as a child?' Well, no, I was an accountant.
Ellen DeGeneres
2727 Likes
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I can't seem to filter myself ever. I used to say when I first started, the unspoken rule was 'no cancer, no AIDS.' But then I started going to hospices and I found that when people are in those kinds of dire situations, they want to hear the joke that is too far,
Kathy Griffin
3 Likes
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A rumor that followed me forever was that my family was in the mafia. For years I had to live with it. They'd call me the mafia princess, so I rolled with it for the rest of high school. People even joke about it today.
Giuliana Rancic
13 Likes
All you have in comedy, in general, is just going with your instincts. You can only hope that other people think that what you think is funny is funny. I don't have an answer but I just try to plough straight ahead.
Will Ferrell
12 Likes
It's funny how the people you'd do anything for are the very same people to fastly turn their back on you when ever it suits them.
Tshepo Koos Maluleke
82 Likes
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Relationships are like fat people, most of them don't work out.
Unknown
2419 Likes
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It's funny, when people talk about the 70s I can tell you the year of every album but when it comes to the later efforts I can't remember the exact years, it's funny isn't it?
Steve Hackett
9 Likes
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