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Funny Promised Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Promised" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I think we're the only jokeless show on television. I mean really, we have no setups and no punch lines. It's not a joke show. There are funny lines and funny moments but again the comedy is born of the human experience and awkward pauses are a great part of what it is to be human.
Rainn Wilson
87 Likes
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I guess you'll never appreciate your freedom as a SINGLE until you finally find yourself in the four walls of MARRIAGE.
Terry Mark
82 Likes
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Nowadays they have 12 directors and 15 producers and 30 writers. And all the writers want their lines said a certain way-which isn't necessarily funny. I mean the lines aren't necessarily so funny to begin with.
Tim Conway
0 Likes
People often ask me how I make things funny. I don't make things funny.
Richard Russo
0 Likes
It's adorable when sleep tries to compete with Facebook.
Unknown
214 Likes
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Behind the complicated details of the world stand the simplicities: God is good, the grown-up man or woman knows the answer to every question, there is such a thing as truth, and justice is as measured and faultless as a clock. Our heroes are simple: they are brave, they tell the truth, they are good swordsmen and they are never in the long run really defeated. That is why no later books satisfy us like those which were read to us in childhood for those promised a world of great simplicity of which we knew the rules, but the later books are complicated and contradictory with experience; they are formed out of our own disappointing memories.
Graham Greene
13 Likes
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Mail your packages early so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas.
Johnny Carson
42 Likes
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People who are funny and smart and return phone calls get much better press than people who are just funny and smart.
Howard Simons
15 Likes
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I wonder if the clothes in China say, 'Made around the corner.'
Unknown
919 Likes
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Laziness is the mother of all bad habits but ultimately she is a MOTHER and we should respect her.
DEV
130 Likes
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Christmas is a time when you get homesick...even when you're home.
Carol Nelson
103 Likes
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Why do single women take advice from other single women? That's like Stevie Wonder giving Ray Charles driving directions.
Hussein Nishah
350 Likes
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A good wife comes from God and a good husband comes from the bank.
Evans Amecha
51 Likes
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Before s.... you help each other get naked, after s.. you only dress yourself. Moral of the story: in life no one helps you once you're fu..ed.
Unknown
2197 Likes
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Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept crashing.
Unknown
696 Likes
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This year, I'm going to buy all of my Christmas gifts from Nike...Made for kids by kids.
Unknown
51 Likes
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It's a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny jean fad.
Unknown
842 Likes
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There should be a relationship status for I don't even know whats going on.
Unknown
38 Likes
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I can't believe it's been a year since I didn't become a better person.
Unknown
20 Likes
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My 'check engine' light came on while driving to work this morning. I looked and the engine is still there.
Unknown
546 Likes
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