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George Carlin Christmas Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "George Carlin Christmas" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands.
George Carlin
8 Likes
Life quotes
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I couldn't commit suicide if my life depended on it
George Carlin
44 Likes
Suicide quotes
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
George Carlin
10 Likes
Truth quotes
I am not alone at all, I thought. I was never alone at all. And that, of course, is the message of Christmas. We are never alone. Not when the night is darkest, the wind coldest, the world seemingly most indifferent. For this is still the time God chooses.
Taylor Caldwell
41 Likes
Inspirational Christmas quotes
Great Christmas quotes
Christmas Inspirational quotes
Christmas is a bridge. We need bridges as the river of time flows past. Today's Christmas should mean creating happy hours for tomorrow and reliving those of yesterday.
Gladys Tabor
43 Likes
Inspirational Christmas quotes
Christmas Inspirational quotes
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Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
George Carlin
20 Likes
Money quotes
Standing ovations have become far too commonplace. What we need are ovations where the audience members all punch and kick one another.
George Carlin
1 Likes
Isnt it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do 'practice?'
George Carlin
17 Likes
Medicine quotes
Doctors quotes
Christmas is most truly Christmas when we celebrate it by giving the light of love to those who need it most.
Ruth Carter Stapleton
57 Likes
Inspirational Christmas quotes
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Christmas Inspirational quotes
Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who would be willing to test any drug they could come up with
George Carlin
2 Likes
Drugs quotes
Funny quotes
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Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of your next dusting has already been established.
George Carlin
3 Likes
Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who would be willing to test any drug they could come up with
George Carlin
12 Likes
Funny quotes
Drugs quotes
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
George Carlin
67 Likes
Humorfunny quotes
Driving quotes
The Religious Right dislikes both abortions and homos..uality. But who has fewer abortions than gays?
George Carlin
40 Likes
Funny Gay quotes
When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat.
George Carlin
6 Likes
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Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics should be told not to fu...
George Carlin
76 Likes
Women quotes
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it
George Carlin
6 Likes
Self-esteem quotes
The more syllables a euphemism has, the further divorced from reality it is
George Carlin
8 Likes
Euphemism quotes
Electricity is really just organized lightning.
George Carlin
28 Likes
Funny quotes
Electricity quotes
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
George Carlin
5 Likes
Authority quotes
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