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Greeting Card Pamper Yourserse Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Greeting Card Pamper Yourserse" sorted by relevance. 400 matching entries found.
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Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful.
Norman Vincent Peale
71 Likes
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Dear Santa, ( ) I've been good all year. ( ) Ok most of the time. ( ) Once in a while. (X) fu.. it. I'll buy my own shit.
Unknown
917 Likes
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A Minneapolis company has come out with a credit card size shotgun that fits in your wallet. The inventor says he invented it to give people a sense of security. Oh yeah, what makes you feel more secure than sitting on shotgun? Now how does this work? What's the first thing a thief steals? Your wallet, oh, now he's got your gun too!
Jay Leno
29 Likes
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Life has never been perfect. It probably never will. But I will never ever lose hope, because I know I always have you to stand by me even if the whole world falls apart. I love you mother, so much more than you even know. Happy Mothers day to you.
Unknown
135 Likes
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Mail your packages early so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas.
Johnny Carson
42 Likes
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I want a one hundred dollar gift card deposited into my locker by noon tomorrow. Preferably to The Gap, but I'd also take Amazon.com, or Office Max. Actually make it Office Max - I have my eye on a label maker. We did not have s... I let you fondle my chest, and it was a glorious moment for you. Unmatched by anything you have heretofore experienced...including cake. -Olive Penderghast
Easy A
27 Likes
Valentine's day has gotten blown way out of proportion. Valentine's Day just used to be for your girlfriend or your wife but now everyone's like 'Oh, happy valentine's day!' I even got a Valentine's Day card from my grandmother. How ridiculous is that? We stopped having s.. years ago!
Greg Giraldo
96 Likes
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I wish Hallmark made a Deadbeat Dad Christmas card.
Unknown
223 Likes
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Unu dem dey a talk, that's true me white like chalk .Likkle little hole bwoy, go play they realest card. Dem holla aye p'wan me yard. That's true me modda mother work hard. Hundred foot 'cause she wan swim in ah the tide.
Collie Buddz
0 Likes
Christmas is a time when you get homesick...even when you're home.
Carol Nelson
103 Likes
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I am a military girlfriend. I hold no formal recognition with the powers that be. I am at the bottom of the chain. I hold no military ID card, I am not a dependent or a parent. The man I love may face unspeakable dangers, and I am at the mercy of those who possess this recognition for news. I understand this and accept this.
Unknown
17 Likes
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I am a navy girlfriend. I hold no formal recognition with the powers that be. I am at the bottom of the chain. I hold no Military ID card, I am not a dependent or a parent. The man I love may face unspeakable dangers, and I am at the mercy of those who possess this recognition for news. I understand this and accept this.
Unknown
153 Likes
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This year, I'm going to buy all of my Christmas gifts from Nike...Made for kids by kids.
Unknown
51 Likes
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Dear Crush, don't be scared if a fat guy in a red suit snatches you away on Christmas Eve. Sincerely, You Were On My Wish List.
Unknown
229 Likes
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Christmas is the season when you buy this year's gifts with next year's money.
Unknown
41 Likes
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My mom is literally a part of me. You can't say that about many people except relatives, and organ donors.
Carrie Latet
336 Likes
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You know how writers are...they create themselves as they create their work. Or perhaps they create their work in order to create themselves.
Orson Scott Card
13 Likes
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At Christmas play and make good cheer, for Christmas comes but once a year.
Thomas Tusser
32 Likes
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To all the beautiful mothers and soon to be mothers who gave us life and love, wishing you a happy mother's day!
Unknown
90 Likes
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Hi! Im Ally McBeal, homewrecker. Heres my card.
Ally McBeal
7 Likes
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