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Jokes On September Monther Frus Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Jokes On September Monther Frus" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Boy: Why can't tampons talk? Girl: Because they're stuck up bi...es.
Dylan Nace
227 Likes
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I'm not Mr. Debonair Suave. I'm just a regular boy who goofs around, pulls pranks, and makes jokes. That doesn't sound very hot to me.
Jensen Ackles
19 Likes
Dear metabolism, I'll miss you...
Unknown
58 Likes
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I went into a French restaraunt and asked the waiter, 'Have you got frog's legs?' He said, 'Yes,' so I said, 'Well hop into the kitchen and get me a cheese sandwich.'
Tommy Cooper
41 Likes
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If a red head guy works at a bakery, does that make him a ginger bread man?
Unknown
78 Likes
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.
Tommy Cooper
44 Likes
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Scottish-Americans tell you that if you want to identify tartans, it's easy - you simply look under the kilt, and if it's a quarter-pounder, you know it's a McDonald's.
Billy Connolly
32 Likes
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I was born in Alabama. I was raised in Georgia. I'm so Southern I'm related to myself. I have a 12-year-old daughter. She takes after my daddy. She ought to. She's his.
Brett Butler
200 Likes
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Prior to September 11, we thought the world beyond our shores was one world of risk and the world in our continent was another world of risk.
John Ashcroft
0 Likes
This president has been reluctant to hold anybody accountable. No one was held accountable after September the 11th. Nobody's been held accountable after the clear flaws in intelligence leading up to the war in Iraq.
Bob Graham
2 Likes
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I'm the kind of person who would come out of the gym...And go straight to McDonalds.
Unknown
157 Likes
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Cos it's strange, isn't it. You stand in the middle of a library and go 'Aaaaaagghhh!!' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.
Tommy Cooper
21 Likes
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What is the best s..ual position to create a gorgeous, charming absolutely attractive and cute baby?.... Ask my parents!
Unknown
201 Likes
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Dear math, grow up and solve your own stupid problems I'm sick and tired of doing it for you!
Unknown
195 Likes
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Today is International Sword Swallowers Day. Im sure there are lots of jokes there, but figured the legit carnies deserve a shout out.
Neil Patrick Harris
7 Likes
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I ain't saying the customer service in my bank is bad, but when I went in the other day and asked the clerk to check my balance...she leaned over and pushed me.
Anonymous
106 Likes
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I recently did the David Letterman Show about my book. He was very serious and made no jokes and it caught me off guard a little bit. He was much more serious than some of the joke shows that journalists get on.
Bob Woodward
0 Likes
Last christmas my sister, Geri, gave me a lovely Cloth calendar. It only took me 5 hours to sew in a Doctor's appointment...
Robert Paul
67 Likes
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I grew up as the ugly duckling. I was the only one with a dark skin and therefor I didn't really fit in. A lot of people made jokes of me as 'the adopted one.'
Eva Longoria
13 Likes
My mom was a ventriloquist and she always was throwing her voice. For ten years I thought the dog was telling me to kill my father.
Wendy Leibman
111 Likes
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