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Witty Valentines Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Witty Valentines" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
If it tastes funny, don't eat it. If it looks funny, call a doctor. If it is funny, it must have been something I said.
Unknown
189 Likes
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If we are suppose to forget about the past, why do we have to take history class anyway?
Unknown
59 Likes
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If s.. were sho.., I'd wear you out. But I wouldn't wear you out in public.
Jarod Kintz
71 Likes
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Dear middle finger, thank you for sticking up for me.
Unknown
1083 Likes
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Thanks for not putting me up for adoption unless you're not really my mom...
Unknown
16 Likes
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Sarcasm is a bodies natural defense against stupid.
Unknown
107 Likes
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Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. So said by the idiot who can't understand it.
Ramandeep Singh
145 Likes
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I never get jealous when I see my ex with someone else, because my parents always taught me to give my used toys to the less fortunate.
Unknown
3730 Likes
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Opportunity tends to knock once, then it's gone...temptation, however, likes to stand there and lean on the damn doorbell!
Sarah Moores
132 Likes
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How come in Spider-man 3, when his suit turned black, Spider-man became a thief and a criminal...
Unknown
68 Likes
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Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute, but set him on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
Unknown
56 Likes
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If I am not worth the wooing, I am surely not worth the winning.
Henry Wadsworth
9 Likes
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To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
Unknown
75 Likes
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You wanna cry? Try using a tissue, it works much better than your Facebook status.
Unknown
360 Likes
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in this world there isn't a single person from whom you cannot learn anything even from, a stupid you can learn how to not to be stupid.
Shubhanshu Tiwari
52 Likes
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You must be a math problem because you're annoying and difficult. I don't wanna solve your problems for you.
Unknown
139 Likes
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People tell me that Senator Edwards got picked for his good looks, his s.. appeal, and his great hair. I say to them, 'How do you think I got the job?
Dick Cheney
60 Likes
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For enduring the bloodcurdling torture of my adolescent years I promise to always keep your electronics functional.
Unknown
17 Likes
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who decided that paper beats rock? Have someone hold up a sheet of paper in front of their face, then throw a rock at it. Who wins?
Unknown
137 Likes
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You've always been a great mom because of your patience, sense of humor, and fondness for daytime drinking.
Unknown
24 Likes
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