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9 11 Jokes Arent Funny Theyre Just P Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "9 11 Jokes Arent Funny Theyre Just P" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.
Robert Maynard Hutchins
77 Likes
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Don't you hate it when you're doing push-ups and you lose count after 1,000...
Unknown
147 Likes
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I like a woman to take control but theyre hard to find. For example, when I go out to a restaurant I know every girl in there wants to come say hi and be s..ually aggressive, but theyre all so gripped by shyness that they dont even make a move. In some cases the shyness is so severe they wont even look at me.
Michael Cera
9 Likes
If you're on the treadmill next to me, the answer is yes...we are racing.
Unknown
77 Likes
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I don't get why gyms have mirrors...I know what I look like. That's why I'm there.
Unknown
122 Likes
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The golden rule of work is that the bosses jokes are ALWAYS funny.
Robert Paul
2280 Likes
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Its just first finding the right musicians that understand it and they have to be excited about what theyre doing. Some musicians want to sit there and play something they wrote to get money instead of getting the song done. So its about the musicians understanding and being able to do what theyre asked to do. Theres no big science behind that too.
Dr Dre
9 Likes
Why is it so hard to find an exercise bike with a nice little basket where I can put my nachos?
Ron Alderson
69 Likes
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Jokes are better than war. Even the most aggressive jokes are better than the least aggressive wars. Even the longest jokes are better than the shortest wars.
George Mikes
11 Likes
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People say laughter is the best medicine. Your face must be curing the world.
Hussein Nishah
303 Likes
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It wasn't until I became more confident with myself and I put myself forward instead of the jokes; at first it was put the jokes out there and I'm just behind the jokes.
Wanda Sykes
0 Likes
Summer romances begin for all kinds of reasons, but when all is said and done, they have one thing in common. Theyre shooting stars, a spectacular moment of light in the heavens, fleeting glimpse of eternity, and in a flash theyre gone.
The Notebook
55 Likes
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If swimming is such a good way to stay in shape; Explain whales...
Unknown
175 Likes
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At the gym Boy doing sit-ups: '1...2...3...' Hot girl walks by Boy: '97...98...99...'
Unknown
193 Likes
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A man commented to his lunch companion: My wife had a funny dream last night. She dreamed she'd married a millionaire. You're lucky, sighed the companion. My wife dreams that in the daytime.
Sam Ewing
2534 Likes
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People may think he's not perfect but in my mind he's beyond perfect when you're able to look into his eyes and see the real him. Having his arms wrapped around you because he cares more about you than anything, the way he says I love you and those cute little inside jokes nobody else would understand the way he giggles at your jokes even when they aren't even funny or the way he talks about you to his friends it makes you realize how much he means to you. His flaws make him perfect and when I'm around him I feel like everything's okay again and he's the solution to all my problems.
Unknown
564 Likes
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So I said, 'Where do you want to go for your anniversary?' She said: 'I want to go somewhere I've never been before.' I said, 'Try the kitchen.'
Henry Youngman
167 Likes
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All these jokes have been pre-approved as funny by me.
Mitch Hedberg
3 Likes
The dreams that you hold for your future are what you dream about at night. Theyre always at the back of your mind. Theyre what your heart desires. They keep you going. Accept reality and have a backup plan, but always follow your dreams no matter what.
Miley Cyrus
61 Likes
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What do you call a blind German? A not see!
Unknown
133 Likes
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