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Dad Balls Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Dad Balls" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I thought for like five years that when you have s.., you come and one of your balls comes out. That's what I thought happened, that you have to come a ball out of that little whole at the tip of your d..k. I was terrified! That's what I thought, you just...Bahh! And you push a ball out and she's screaming and there's blood everywhere...and you can only do it twice and then you're out of balls. That's what I thought. You come and have two babies, and then you just walk around with an empty sack for the rest of your life. Which turned out to be true...
Louis CK
12 Likes
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Those of you who do have a father cherish every moment, I don't know what it's like because my dad was never there for me.
Unknown
142 Likes
Deadbeat Dad quotes
A Bad Dad quotes
Bad Fathers quotes
Cherish quotes
I wish Hallmark made a Deadbeat Dad Christmas card.
Unknown
223 Likes
Deadbeat Dad quotes
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Bad Fathers quotes
He was all emotion all the time, constantly talking about his feelings and his profound love for her. He was minutes from getting his first period. He wrote poems too. It's my personal belief that if men are writing poems, they're making up for something else like a big hair back, or one ball. Not that one ball is a bad thing. Especially since I don't know any females who are dying to their their hands on a set of balls. The way I see it, the less balls, the better.
Chelsea Handler
25 Likes
Hansel: I guess you can dere-lick my balls cap-E-tan. Derek Zoolander: I can Dere-lick my own balls, thank you very much.
Zoolander
7 Likes
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My dad had been an actor... not only had my dad been an actor, but his dad had been an actor, and my great-grandfather had been an actor. And who knows before then?
David Hyde Pierce
1 Likes
A deadbeat is something I would never be. My dad left me behind and I would never do that to my children.
Unknown
125 Likes
Deadbeat Dad quotes
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Words cannot express how much I love my Dad. Strongest man I know. I am beyond blessed to have him as MY Dad.
Unknown
62 Likes
I never got to choose you, you just became my dad. So I'm grateful to my mother for the great taste that she had.
Unknown
45 Likes
Step Dad quotes
Well, I am a lot like my dad, and the character of Ted is based on my dad.
Max Cannon
11 Likes
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I probably have an earlier curfew than anyone. My mom wants to keep me really safe and my dad's not overly protective, but he's a dad no matter what.
Miley Cyrus
22 Likes
The problem with me, as far as getting married and having a family, is that my comedy is so important to me. So I don't know if I'll ever be as good a dad as my dad.
Adam Sandler
12 Likes
My dad had been shortstop when he was in college, and you know, when you're a kid, you want to be just like your dad.
Derek Jeter
12 Likes
'Tom Cruise & I are around the same age...there is no reason why I can't be Ethan Hunt.' -My Dad while watching MI:4 HA! I love my Dad!
Tahj Mowry
25 Likes
Also, to be honest, my dad wanted me to be an athlete. And I think all sons want to prove something to their dad. So now, aged 35, I want to see what I can achieve physically.
Joe Manganiello
2 Likes
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When I was at Ole Miss, I called my dad up one time and said, Hey, Dad, have you ever looked at your stats here? They're not very good.
Eli Manning
20 Likes
Kid to his Dad as they watch TV: Dad, tell me again how when you were my age you had to walk all the way across the room to change a channel.
Anonymous
6 Likes
Funny quotes
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My dad spent his whole life getting into fights for telling what he believed to be the truth. Basically it comes from my dad-and he's screaming right-wing, so there you are.
Thom Yorke
1 Likes
Steve: I can't believe you muscled out your own son. You stink, dad. Stan: Oh, come on, what's more important, your hopes and dreams, or me making more than your mother?!
American Dad
39 Likes
Dad? What's up Dad! What's happenin'? -Alexandra King
The Descendants
1 Likes
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