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Funny Humor Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Humor" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Two red blood cells met and fell in love. But alas, it was in vein.
Nikhil Saluja
58 Likes
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If my boss paid me in Trident Layers, I'd probably have to kick his ass.
Unknown
387 Likes
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I have no problem texting while driving, but I won't text while going down stairs. That shits dangerous.
Unknown
263 Likes
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When they discover the center of the universe, a lot of people are going to be very disappointed that they are not it.
Rick Sutter
88 Likes
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I'm still waiting for the, 'Once you go black, you never go back.' episode on Mythbusters.
Unknown
119 Likes
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A push up bra is like a bag of chips; you open the bag and it's half empty.
Unknown
90 Likes
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See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a pe..s, and only enough blood to run one at a time.
Robin Williams
27 Likes
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you're spreading rumors about me? At least you found a hobby spreading something other than your legs.
Nishan Panwar
495 Likes
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Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.
Drew Carey
34 Likes
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Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.
Robin Williams
11 Likes
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If, someday, we all go to prison for downloading music; I hope they separate us by genres.
Orebela Gbenga
92 Likes
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Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.
Drew Carey
38 Likes
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Strangers think I'm quiet. My friends think I'm outgoing. My best friends know that I'm completely insane.
Unknown
193 Likes
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My bank statement is just a visual record of bad decisions
Unknown
34 Likes
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Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.
Drew Carey
27 Likes
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Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.
Robin Williams
30 Likes
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Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics should be told not to fu..
George Carlin
61 Likes
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Women are like fish... neither would get in trouble if they kept their mouths shut.
Unknown
220 Likes
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Sometimes there are no words to describe how we feel about some people. Thank God, He gave us the middle finger.
Unknown
549 Likes
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Humor is the affectionate communication of insight.
Leo Rosten
1 Likes
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