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Funny Single Girl Status Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Single Girl Status" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
You know how they say when you die, your whole life flashes before you? Well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
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770 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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China is only winning the Olympics because they made all the equipment...
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398 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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I want to have 3 kids and name them Ctrl, Alt and Delete. Then if they fu.. up I will just hit them all at once.
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496 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
How much cocaine does Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men...
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475 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
I'm not saying she was stupid, but I asked her how to spell Mississippi and she said 'the river or the state?'
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521 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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Dear Google: They are only using you to get to me! Sincerely Wikipedia
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240 Likes
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The only thing I gained from 2012 was weight.
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79 Likes
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Just a heads up that we aren't going into that war you heard about in between twerking videos.
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32 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
I hate it when I tell someone I'll be there in 15 minutes yet they choose to call me every half an hour anyway.
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326 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
I have a memory foam mattress...and I really hope that it doesn't remember everything.
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349 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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My wife always complains that I dont take her anywhere expensive... so I took her to the Gas Station.
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1255 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Friends are like condoms. They are always there to protect you when things get hard.
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614 Likes
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I think I should tell you what people are saying behind your back....Nice ass.
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148 Likes
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Whoever said nothing is impossible...Never tried to staple water to a tree.
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395 Likes
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I don't need to lie. But, sometimes, I like to give the truth an extreme makeover.
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305 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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How do homeless people always seem to get the shopping cart that has all four good wheels?
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353 Likes
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I can't believe it's 2012 and there is still no fold button on my dryer.
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81 Likes
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Dubstep : A rap battle between the Autobots and Decepticons.
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143 Likes
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Not trying to be rude, but your d..k gets less action then a white crayon.
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1218 Likes
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My mother never understood the irony in calling me a "son-of-a-bi...."
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2696 Likes
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