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Funny Small Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Small Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I've often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
Jimmy Carter
123 Likes
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Foot: A special device for finding furniture in the dark.
Unknown
29 Likes
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I've got a very poor sense of direction. I keep forgetting which way is forwards.
Geoffrey Parfitt
13 Likes
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I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
Steven Wright
461 Likes
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The fastest way to make your own Anti-freeze is to hide her nightgown.
Unknown
24 Likes
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I can't stand people that don't know the difference between 'your' and 'you're.' Their so stupid...
Unknown
222 Likes
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I'm positive I lost an electron, I better keep an ion that.
Unknown
144 Likes
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I used to have Mad Cow's disease, but I'm alright Nooooooooow.
Billy Connolly
142 Likes
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I slept like a log last night. I woke up in the fireplace.
Tommy Cooper
20 Likes
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Reasons to date me: I laugh at my own jokes so you don't have to.
Amit Verma
99 Likes
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There's an old saying - There's No Place Like Home. Well, I went in the house next door, and it was very similar.
Geoffrey Parfitt
35 Likes
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I used to be a watchmaker. It was a great job and I made my own hours.
Nikhil Saluja
56 Likes
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A blind man walks into a bar...and a table...and a chair.
Unknown
135 Likes
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I don't care what the haters and naysayers say. If they make jokes about me, I'll laugh because they'll probably be funny.
Paula Deen
3 Likes
Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because he had no body to go with.
Alice Jane
153 Likes
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I'm not an optimist but hopefully one day I will be.
Nikhil Saluja
90 Likes
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I just made Romney noodles Obama self.
Unknown
123 Likes
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You should make a point of trying every experience once, excepting incest and folk-dancing.
Anonymous
17 Likes
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Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.
Emo Philips
23 Likes
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I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.
Rodney Dangerfield
149 Likes
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