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Best Funny Video Chatting Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Best Funny Video Chatting" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph.
Shirley Temple
44 Likes
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A man who says marriage is a 50-50 proposition doesn't understand two things: 1 - Women, 2 - Fractions.
Melchor Lim
101 Likes
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Going to McDonald's for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.
Unknown
1203 Likes
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My parents told me 'You watch too much TV and should try reading more!' So I turned on the subtitles.
Unknown
929 Likes
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When I was a kid, I used to sing, 'A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, ELEMENO, P'
Unknown
2231 Likes
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Its crazy because people expect you to be funny all the time and every day is not a funny day. I go to funerals and people are like 'tell a joke' and 'say one of your lines in a movie.' ITS A FUNERAL MAN!
Chris Tucker
34 Likes
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"I love the movie previews... you know... Why is it whenever you're watching a movie preview you always feel like you have to comment on it to the person you're with? 'Yeah... I'm not gonna see that movie. I'm gonna wait for that on VIDEO.' I mean when you think about it, it's just a commercial for the movie. You know, you never sit at home watching tv-- "Yeah... I'm not buying that cereal. I don't like cereals with raisins in 'em. ...What's your take on that commercial? Where you goin'?"
Jim Gaffigan
8 Likes
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"I love the movie previews... you know... Why is it whenever you're watching a movie preview you always feel like you have to comment on it to the person you're with? 'Yeah... I'm not gonna see that movie. I'm gonna wait for that on VIDEO.' I mean when you think about it, it's just a commercial for the movie. You know, you never sit at home watching tv-- "Yeah... I'm not buying that cereal. I don't like cereals with raisins in 'em. ...What's your take on that commercial? Where you goin'?"
Jim Gaffigan
13 Likes
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A man commented to his lunch companion: My wife had a funny dream last night. She dreamed she'd married a millionaire. You're lucky, sighed the companion. My wife dreams that in the daytime.
Sam Ewing
2534 Likes
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God put haters on this earth for two reasons: 1. To motivate others. 2. To give no lives a job.
Surgeo Bell
80 Likes
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The word 'funny' is a bit like the word 'love' - we don't have enough words to describe the many varieties.
George Saunders
81 Likes
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Nothing makes me want a relationship to fail more than matching profile pictures.
Unknown
461 Likes
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Let's never speak of 2013 again.
Unknown
5 Likes
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I like being a funny lady. I think there's nothing s..ier than a funny lady.
Maya Rudolph
3 Likes
Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist. What's in that pipe that he's smoking?"
Arlo Guthrie
21 Likes
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Roses are reddish, Violets are bluish, If it werent for Christmas, Wed all be Jewish.
Benny Hill
92 Likes
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Dear Santa, what I want for Christmas is... your list with names of naughty girls.
Unknown
693 Likes
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Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.
Victor Borge
25 Likes
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The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
George Carlin
85 Likes
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I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.
Unknown
137 Likes
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