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Funny Expert Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Expert" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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My swimsuit told me to go to the gym. But my sweatpants were like, Nah girl, you're good.
Unknown
86 Likes
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It's time to renew that gym membership we're never going to use again.
Unknown
86 Likes
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Oh I'm sorry, I didnt realize that you are an expert on my life and how I should live it. Please continue while I take notes.
Unknown
305 Likes
Sarcastic quotes
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I believe, based on the activities, and I am not an expert on terrorism by any stretch, but I believe that when they attacked the United States and they attacked New York and Washington, D.C., they thought they could defeat us.
Jim Walsh
0 Likes
Well...hardest substance found in Nature, they cut glass, suggest marriage, I suppose it replaced the dog as a girl's best friend and that's about it. M: Refreshing to hear there's one subject you're not an expert on...
James Bond
4 Likes
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I grew up doing musical theater. So, I was immediately attracted to the music and performance aspects of it. That fact that it's actually funny, not trying to be funny, but actually funny was appealing, too.
Chris Colfer
3 Likes
A comedian's body is funny as well as his mind being funny, his whole personage is funny.
Bobby Darin
1 Likes
Based on assessment of all available information and following several expert consultations, I have decided to raise the current level of influenza pandemic alert from phase 4 to phase 5.
Margaret Chan
4 Likes
Im in a great spot professionally. Its something I used to bi... to my agent about, Why am I not in that spot?' Ive been in so many movies that sucked that I consider myself an expert in the field of how NOT to make a bad movie.
Robert Downey Jr
3 Likes
Since she got a cause and stopped being funny. I think she's real funny, but lately it's all been hearts and flowers and tears and saving teenagers and creating a role model. And that ain't funny. No giggles there.
Andy Richter
5 Likes
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To preserve yourself as the center of the world, to stay your own best authority on everything, your own expert on all topics, infallible, omniscient. Always, every time of the month, forever: Use birth control.
Chuck Palahniuk
2 Likes
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In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert's mind there are few
Shunryu Suzuki
5 Likes
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Have you heard of this new thing called the internet? It's giving people new expectations. It's allowing them to become their own expert. Knowledge lies anxious at their fingertips. Gloss over the truth in your advertising and you'll quickly be dismissed as a poser.
Roy H Williams
5 Likes
I'm an expert witness in a case that's in appeal about a guy who allegedly misappropriated source code from a major, major company - he actually worked there and then apparently they found it on his laptop later.
Kevin Mitnick
0 Likes
I'm not an education expert, and frankly I don't want to make education decisions for our state. But I am experienced at successfully managing organizations, and putting people on a path where they can succeed.
Linda Lingle
3 Likes
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If nuclear power plants are safe, let the commerical insurance industry insure them. Until these most expert judges of risk are willing to gamble with their money, I'm not willing to gamble with the health and safety of my family.
Donna Reed
14 Likes
I believe - I'm not a political expert, but I believe there is a broad consensus, a middle ground if you will, that Democrats and Republicans, business people and workers can agree on, to get this - the economy growing faster, getting people back to work.
Austan Goolsbee
10 Likes
In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert's mind there are few
Shunryu Suzuki
0 Likes
Mind quotes
Never become so much of an expert that you stop gaining expertise. View life as a continuous learning experience.
Denis Waitley
5 Likes
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I mean, it's fun for us to talk about issues. You know, there's no one issue we spend a lot of time on probably, because he gets to do that all day with somebody else who's a lot more expert at issues than I am.
Laura Bush
0 Likes
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