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Funny Facebook For Statust Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Facebook For Statust" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Unknown
1682 Likes
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I have an eating disorder. I be eatin DIS order of fries, and DIS order of nuggets, and DIS order of wings and so on, so on, you get it.
Unknown
291 Likes
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That awkward moment when you say 'Hey' to someone on facebook chat, and seconds later they sign out. How Rude.
Unknown
538 Likes
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Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
Unknown
1536 Likes
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Liking your own status, is like high-fiving yourself in public...
Unknown
201 Likes
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Chicken pot pie sounds like such a good idea. If you add commas.
Unknown
336 Likes
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I don't care what they say, the first guy who milked a cow and drank it was a massive pervert.
Unknown
883 Likes
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When you're putting on jeans with holes and your foot goes through the hole.
Unknown
72 Likes
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Thanks for inviting me to your baby shower, it reminded me to take my birth control pill.
Unknown
205 Likes
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If you think nothing is impossible, try slamming a revolving door.
Hussein Nishah
317 Likes
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Whenever I talk with someone who stutters...I yell 'REMIX!' so they feel cool and shit.
Unknown
142 Likes
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Sorry your decision to quietly change your relationship status was broadcast to every single one of your Facebook friends.
Unknown
13 Likes
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On a scale from Kristen Stewart to Nicki Minaj, how many different facial expressions do you have?
Unknown
264 Likes
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Hey I just met you, and girl you look crazy, what brands your make-up, Crayola maybe?
Unknown
605 Likes
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They say you are what you eat. Well that's funny...I don't recall eating a s..y beast today.
Unknown
100 Likes
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Everyones middle name should be, motherfu..in...try it. Doesn't it sound so great?
Unknown
370 Likes
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Okay, Seriously. Facebook isn't your psychologist. If your crying go get a tissue.
Unknown
127 Likes
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Is wondering who was the first to look at a cow and think: I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out!
Unknown
223 Likes
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Whats the worst thing to do to a blind person? Leave the plunger in the toilet.
Unknown
327 Likes
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I just saw a fat guy with a shirt that said: I beat anorexia. Defiantly made my day.
Unknown
44 Likes
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