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Funny Roses Are Red Jokesred Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Roses Are Red Jokesred Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Some people are always grumbling because roses have thorns; I am thankful that thorns have roses.
Alphonse Karr
4 Likes
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Jokes are better than war. Even the most aggressive jokes are better than the least aggressive wars. Even the longest jokes are better than the shortest wars.
George Mikes
11 Likes
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Chris Hemsworth is like Christopher Reeve in that he can do two things: he can wear a big red cape without a shred of self-consciousness. But he's also funny as hell, and he's so sweet. So with all the fish-out-of-water stuff, he's so funny. So he does almost two jobs in a way.
Tom Hiddleston
7 Likes
People say laughter is the best medicine. Your face must be curing the world.
Hussein Nishah
303 Likes
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It wasn't until I became more confident with myself and I put myself forward instead of the jokes; at first it was put the jokes out there and I'm just behind the jokes.
Wanda Sykes
0 Likes
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When I met you my heart skipped a beat, the sun became the moon, and cold turned into heat, roses werent red, violets werent blue, all becasue I fell in love with you...
Unknown
264 Likes
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Life is not a bed of roses, But you can chose to make your own roses. Learn to smile at things that use to break you.
Terry Mark
12 Likes
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On a day you least expect a dozen roses will you get. But a dozen roses they will not be; for there will only be eleven. For you are the twelth rose sent from heaven.
Josh Boynton
4 Likes
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If swimming is such a good way to stay in shape; Explain whales...
Unknown
175 Likes
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At the gym Boy doing sit-ups: '1...2...3...' Hot girl walks by Boy: '97...98...99...'
Unknown
193 Likes
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What though youth gave love and roses, Age still leaves us friends and wine.
Thomas More
16 Likes
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A man commented to his lunch companion: My wife had a funny dream last night. She dreamed she'd married a millionaire. You're lucky, sighed the companion. My wife dreams that in the daytime.
Sam Ewing
2534 Likes
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People may think he's not perfect but in my mind he's beyond perfect when you're able to look into his eyes and see the real him. Having his arms wrapped around you because he cares more about you than anything, the way he says I love you and those cute little inside jokes nobody else would understand the way he giggles at your jokes even when they aren't even funny or the way he talks about you to his friends it makes you realize how much he means to you. His flaws make him perfect and when I'm around him I feel like everything's okay again and he's the solution to all my problems.
Unknown
564 Likes
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So I said, 'Where do you want to go for your anniversary?' She said: 'I want to go somewhere I've never been before.' I said, 'Try the kitchen.'
Henry Youngman
167 Likes
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All these jokes have been pre-approved as funny by me.
Mitch Hedberg
3 Likes
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I failed my Driver's test. Driving teacher: 'What do you do at a red light?' Me: 'I usually respond to texts and check my Facebook.'
Unknown
758 Likes
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What do you call a blind German? A not see!
Unknown
133 Likes
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I've been doing the Fonda workout: the Peter Fonda workout. That's where I wake up, take a hit of acid, smoke a joint, and run to my sister's house and ask her for money.
Kevin Meaney
175 Likes
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Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
Mark Twain
50 Likes
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So I went to the dentist. He said Say Aaah. I said Why? He said My dog's died.'
Tim Vine
18 Likes
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