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Funny Spring Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Spring" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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My daughter's really into the Halloween spirit. She's been in her pregnant lady constume for months now.
Unknown
297 Likes
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If my boss knew how unproductive I am on Fridays, he wouldn't want me here either.
Unknown
178 Likes
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When people ask me plz because it's shorter than please. I tell them no because it's shorter than yes .
Unknown
357 Likes
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I have to continue reminding myself that it's Halloween so I can't rely on my instincts to shoot zombies in the head.
Unknown
120 Likes
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I wonder what the blood alcohol level is of all these mosquitos that keep biting me?
Unknown
372 Likes
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Today I saw a baby with a bib that said 'This dumbass put my cape on backwards.'
Unknown
921 Likes
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Funny thing how you first meet the woman that you marry. I first met the wife in a tunnel of love. She was digging it.
Les Dawson
1182 Likes
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SINGLE AND (maybe if youre attractive funny and educated and/or Ryan Gosling ) READY TO MINGLE.
Unknown
281 Likes
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Shortest horror story in history: Tomorrow is Monday.
Unknown
375 Likes
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Wishing you even a minuscule percentage of the wealth and attention that will be showered upon the Kardashian fetus in 2013.
Unknown
7 Likes
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The trouble with unemployment is that the minute you wake up in the morning you're on the job.
Slappy White
16 Likes
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Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them.
Ogden Nash
150 Likes
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Trust me, when I woke up today I had no plans to be awesome, but shit happens.
Unknown
660 Likes
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Never trust a man in a wheelchair with dirty sho...
Unknown
1758 Likes
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The leadership instinct you are born with is the backbone. You develop the funny bone and the wishbone that go with it.
Dwight Eisenhower
48 Likes
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The misconception is that standup comics are always on. I don't know any really funny comics that are annoying and constantly trying to be funny all the time.
Joe Rogan
2 Likes
I am fully committed to Hannah Montana. It's what gave me this amazing opportunity to reach out to so many people. I'm really excited about our new season. We are making great new episodes that I can't wait for our fans to see and I'm looking forward to the Hannah Montana movie that will be out in the spring.
Miley Cyrus
25 Likes
I can speak of my own criterion for judging whether or not a book is good or bad. I ask of it a single question, From how deep and true an impulse did it spring? Was it written merely to shock? Only to make money? Or was it written to create somethin.
Lawrence Clark Powell
1 Likes
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A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table theres nothing wrong with them, but its hard to stop thinking about it.
Unknown
23 Likes
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I resolve to stop having meaningless s.. in 2014, so I suggest you pay me a compliment or get me liquored up ASAP.
Unknown
17 Likes
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