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Hilarious Facebook Stutuses Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Hilarious Facebook Stutuses" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I'm dreaming of a Christmas as white but not nearly as depressing as the Republican party.
Unknown
30 Likes
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You would think that pot had some kind of power; I mean come on, it's a plant, not a reason for living. Controlled by a plant, how hilarious. A plant! A fu..ing plant!
Henry Rollins
11 Likes
I'm flattered you actually think I can afford the things on your holiday wish list.
Unknown
40 Likes
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Love is the answer, but while youre waiting for the answer, s.. raises some pretty good questions.
Woody Allen
9 Likes
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Thanks for agreeing not to buy each other anything for Christmas and then making me feel guilty by buying something anyway.
Unknown
61 Likes
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Let's give thanks our neighborhood is too dangerous for Christmas caroling.
Unknown
8 Likes
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Christmas shopping for you has made me realize that I know absolutely nothing about you.
Unknown
59 Likes
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All I want for Christmas this year is the 2008 version of Obama.
Unknown
16 Likes
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I can't believe you're alone over the holidays considering how easy you are to get into bed.
Unknown
47 Likes
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Whether you're offended by me saying Happy Holidays or Merry Christmas, take comfort in knowing I don't really mean either.
Unknown
23 Likes
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On this last tour we set it up like a play: We did act one and act two with an intermission and costume change, and that's hilarious 'cause we just exaggerated everything everyone would ever say about a band like us. And I think that we'll try to do something different on the next tour, step it up.
Pete Wentz
4 Likes
If you're sad about being single this holiday season, remember that even Kim Kardashian is unmarried 293 days a year.
Unknown
11 Likes
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I want that which is hilarious and that which is heartbreaking to occupy the same territory in the book because I think they very often occupy the same territory in life, much as we try to separate them.
Richard Russo
1 Likes
Some people should have two Facebook accounts. One for each face.
Unknown
264 Likes
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If you had invented Facebook. You would've invented Facebook.
Mark Zuckerberg
3 Likes
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Because I'm the only performer who comes out and says I've had plastic surgery, I've become the plastic surgery poster girl, which is hilarious, because everybody has done it and they all deny it. They stand there, like the Bride of Frankenstein, they've all got stitches, and they all say, 'I've done nothing.' I talk about it.
Joan Rivers
9 Likes
I wonder if the clothes in China say, 'Made around the corner.'
Unknown
919 Likes
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Actions speak louder than Facebook posts. It's time to go do some of those things you are typing about.
Unknown
73 Likes
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I'm not addicted to facebook! You know, I just use it whenever I have time. Lunch time, break time, bed time, off time, that time, this time, any time, all the time!
Unknown
587 Likes
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May your holiday season be filled with friends and family who don't bring up your school's horrifying pedophiliac s.. scandal.
Unknown
16 Likes
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