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True And Funny Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "True And Funny Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
I can't stand people that don't know the difference between 'your' and 'you're.' Their so stupid...
Unknown
222 Likes
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There's an old saying - There's No Place Like Home. Well, I went in the house next door, and it was very similar.
Geoffrey Parfitt
35 Likes
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I've got a very poor sense of direction. I keep forgetting which way is forwards.
Geoffrey Parfitt
13 Likes
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Want to hear the joke about the vacuum? Nevermind...It sucks.
Unknown
204 Likes
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I slept like a log last night. I woke up in the fireplace.
Tommy Cooper
20 Likes
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I lost my coat, hopefully someone didn't jacket.
Unknown
78 Likes
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I haven't taken my Christmas lights down. They look so nice on the pumpkin.
Winston Spear
19 Likes
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The fastest way to make your own Anti-freeze is to hide her nightgown.
Unknown
24 Likes
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Reasons to date me: I laugh at my own jokes so you don't have to.
Amit Verma
99 Likes
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I don't care what the haters and naysayers say. If they make jokes about me, I'll laugh because they'll probably be funny.
Paula Deen
3 Likes
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I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, Six should be enough.
Les Dawson
81 Likes
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I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
Spike Milligan
30 Likes
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A blind man walks into a bar...and a table...and a chair.
Unknown
135 Likes
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I used to be a watchmaker. It was a great job and I made my own hours.
Nikhil Saluja
56 Likes
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A husband is living proof that a wife can take a joke.
Hussein Nishah
397 Likes
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I went to a meeting for premature ejaculators. I left early.
Jack Benny
303 Likes
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I met this guy who said he loved children, then I found out he was on parole for it.
Monica Piper
124 Likes
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I know why Superman left Krypton. Earth was the only place he could get steroids!
Milton Berle
105 Likes
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because he had no body to go with.
Alice Jane
153 Likes
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So I rang up British Telecom, I said 'I want to report a nuisance caller', he said 'Not you again'.
Frank Carson
28 Likes
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