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Ugly Funny Facebook Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Ugly Funny Facebook" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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The closest that I've gotten to murder: Holding Oreos under the milk until the bubbles stop...
Unknown
576 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Sponsored Links
Wanna hear a joke about my pe..s? Never mind, it's too long.
Unknown
3462 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Short quotes
I wish I could google "things to eat in my fridge" so I wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed.
Unknown
1060 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
I'm pretty sure I have a defective iphone 5, I keep pressing the home button and I'm still at work.
Unknown
264 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
I need breakfast! If I were any more hungry right now, Brad and Angelina would adopt me.
Unknown
176 Likes
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hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm 4 months pregnant, and its your baby .
Carlos Banks
190 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Women who complain are like yellow traffic lights. Nobody really pays attention to them.
Unknown
276 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Unknown
1682 Likes
Witty Facebook Status quotes
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I have an eating disorder. I be eatin DIS order of fries, and DIS order of nuggets, and DIS order of wings and so on, so on, you get it.
Unknown
291 Likes
Funny quotes
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That awkward moment when you say 'Hey' to someone on facebook chat, and seconds later they sign out. How Rude.
Unknown
538 Likes
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Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
Unknown
1536 Likes
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Liking your own status, is like high-fiving yourself in public...
Unknown
201 Likes
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I just saw a fat guy with a shirt that said: I beat anorexia. Defiantly made my day.
Unknown
44 Likes
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There is nothing as disgusting as the feeling you get the moment that your finger breaks through the toilet paper.
Unknown
305 Likes
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Sorry your decision to quietly change your relationship status was broadcast to every single one of your Facebook friends.
Unknown
13 Likes
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Okay, Seriously. Facebook isn't your psychologist. If your crying go get a tissue.
Unknown
127 Likes
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When I kill a bug in my house, I leave the dead body around for a bit to warn the others.
Unknown
436 Likes
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If you think nothing is impossible, try slamming a revolving door.
Hussein Nishah
317 Likes
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Everyones middle name should be, motherfu..in...try it. Doesn't it sound so great?
Unknown
370 Likes
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If you don't have an iPhone I feel bad for you, son. I got 99 Emojis & you can't see none.
Unknown
187 Likes
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