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Funny Dead Beat Dads Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Dead Beat Dads" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
Happy Fathers day to my dads! Thank you for loving me SO much and making me feel special everyday. I so appreciate you.
Jenna Dewan Tatum
63 Likes
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My dads new nick name is Papa-razzi cuz he won't stop taking pics of me lol.
Chanel Dudley
9 Likes
Girls who feel valued by their dads are more radiant, less desperate for a boyfriend & more careful whom they choose as a life partner.
Unknown
26 Likes
In the morning he was lying dead on one of the beds fully clothed. He was dead. I got the impression he wanted to go, and I must have killed him. I can't remember strangling him. I just sat there shocked.
Dennis Nilsen
1 Likes
Until it is kindled by a spirit as flamingly alive as the one which gave it birth a book is dead to us. Words divested of their magic are but dead hieroglyphs.
H Jackson Brown Jr
1 Likes
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I've said it before, and I'll say it again. If you think you're alive then you're better off dead.
Bring Me The Horizon
53 Likes
Better Off Dead quotes
Youd be better off dead. I rather you were.
Jacob Black
23 Likes
Better Off Dead quotes
Sometimes I think I'd be better off dead. No, wait, not me, you.
Jack Handey
6 Likes
Better Off Dead quotes
Our dead are never dead to us, until we have forgotten them.
George Eliot
1 Likes
Better off dead than chillin' with the feds.
Unknown
12 Likes
Better Off Dead quotes
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Sometimes I think I'd be better off dead. No, wait, not me, you.
Jack Handey
9 Likes
Better Off Dead quotes
A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell them for a dollar. They're worth so much more after I'm a goner. And maybe then you'll hear the words I've been singing. Funny when you're dead how people start listening.
The Band Perry
145 Likes
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All I know is what the words know, and dead things, and that makes a handsome little sum, with a beginning and a middle and an end, as in the well-built phrase and the long sonata of the dead.
Samuel Beckett
3 Likes
Knowledge quotes
First they put away the dealers, then they put away the prostitutes, then they shooed away the bums, and beat and bashed the queers. Turned away asylum seekers, fed us suspicions and fears. We didn't raise our voice, we didn't make a fuss. It's funny, there was no one left to notice when they came for us.
Peyton Sawyer
32 Likes
You make me beat around the bush just to beat around your bush.
Wale
31 Likes
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Spooning For girls: A nice, warm and cozy cuddle. For guys: A dead arm, a face full of hair and a awkward boner that you can't do anything about.
Unknown
424 Likes
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So one day as a kid I was at the local Zoo. I was bored and kept pestering my Dad to go and play. Eventually he agreed, took me over to the lion enclosure, threw me in and said: There ya go, play dead...
Robert Paul
44 Likes
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A dad is someone who wants to catch you before you fall but instead picks you up, brushes you off, and lets you try again.
Nishan Panwar
92 Likes
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What makes you a man isnt the ability to conceive a child; its having the courage to raise one.
Unknown
71 Likes
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Dead I am the life, dig into the skin. Knuckle crack the bone, 21 to win Dead. I am the dog, hound of hell you cry Devil on your back, I can never die.
Rob Zombie
2 Likes
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