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Funny Ex Boyfriend Jokesd Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Ex Boyfriend Jokesd Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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My New Years resolution list usually starts with the desire to lose between 10 and 3,000 pounds.
Nia Vardalos
4 Likes
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I forgot to post on Facebook that I was going to the gym...Now this whole work-out was a waste of time.
Unknown
308 Likes
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Most people don't realize this, But you can actually go to the gym without telling Facebook about it.
Unknown
293 Likes
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Why do women live longer than men? Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bills does.
Nishan Panwar
370 Likes
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Do not take your ex boyfriend's bad opinion of you as the truth. Nothing he thinks or says about you is about you, but rather a reflection of his own reality.
Unknown
503 Likes
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There are three sides to an argument, your side, my side, and the right side, which is still my side!
Unknown
111 Likes
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Taking your ex back is like going to a yard sale and buying back your own crap!
Unknown
251 Likes
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When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that Uncle Caveman was a bear.
Jack Handey
63 Likes
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Getting back with an ex is pretty much like taking a shower and putting your dirty underwear back on.
Unknown
302 Likes
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In my wildest dreams, you always play the hero. In my darkest hour of night, you rescue me, you save my life.
Bliss And Cerney
246 Likes
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Give a man a job and you have an employee. Teach a man how to shift blame and you have a manager.
Unknown
75 Likes
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We fit together so well...it's like pieces of a puzzle, the way your hand fits the curve of my hip and the way my head rests on your shoulder, the way our hands just melt into one, and the way I feel complete when I'm with you...like the picture's finally completed and I'll never have to wonder what I'm missing.
E E Cummings
486 Likes
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Don't get all depressed over a guy from the past.That's like getting sad because the garbage man picked up the trash.
Unknown
62 Likes
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.
Robert Frost
397 Likes
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.
Robert Frost
232 Likes
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A woman tells her doctor, 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says, 'It's old age.' The woman says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly as well.'
Tommy Cooper
72 Likes
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Someone told me to give my ex directions but I told them that DOGS can always find there way home.
Unknown
517 Likes
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I forgot Rihanna's ex-boyfriend's name...Then it hit me...
Unknown
750 Likes
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Boy: is your name Google?, Girl: No!!... Why? Boy: Because you got everything I am searching for
Unknown
130 Likes
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I will stop peeping into my boyfriend's female friends profile on facebook.
Unknown
20 Likes
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