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English Status Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "English Status" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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If your girlfriend claims that she never looks at your Facebook profile; Try changing your status to 'Single' and wait 3-5 minutes...
Unknown
476 Likes
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That awkward moment when you post a funny status on Facebook and someone has to ruin it by commenting being all serious.
Unknown
549 Likes
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Dear Facebook, thanks for reminding me why moving away from my hometown was the best decision ever.
Unknown
106 Likes
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I wonder how some people can keep up with both their Tumblr, Twitter, Facebook...I cant even keep up with the Kardashians.
Unknown
313 Likes
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Making a good Facebook status and then the next day you see it on someone else's page...
Unknown
1121 Likes
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Does anyone have that light switch in their house that they really don't know what it goes to...
Unknown
947 Likes
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Dance like the photos not being tagged. Love like you've never been unfriended. Sing like nobody's following. Share like you care. And do it all like it wont end up on Youtube!
Raymond Estrada
634 Likes
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Facebook: the only book teens read these days.
Azgraybebly Joslan
408 Likes
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Linkedin invitations are like herpes...They pop up from time to time to remind you they still exist and nobody wants them.
Unknown
117 Likes
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When ever I get a headache I take two tablet of aspirin and keep away from children just like the bottle says.
Hussein Nishah
855 Likes
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I'd be more upset about the NSA accessing my phone records if I used my phone for anything but texting and taking pictures of my d..k.
Unknown
45 Likes
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If someone says expect the unexpected slap them in the face and say 'I bet you didn't expect that!'
Unknown
427 Likes
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If Facebook ever shuts down. You'll see people roaming the streets shoving pictures in others faces screaming 'Do you like this!?!?!.. DO YOU!?!?!'
Unknown
1647 Likes
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I hate weddings. Old people would poke me saying You're next. They stopped when I started going up to them at funerals and poking them, saying, You're next.
Unknown
3215 Likes
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Heaven is an American salary, a Chinese cook, an English house, and a Japanese wife. Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary, an English cook, a Japanese house, and an American wife.
James H Kabbler III
25 Likes
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For no continuity of social act is possible without a corresponding social status and the many different kinds of act required in an industrial state, with its high degree of specialization, make for corresponding classification of status.
Kenneth Burke
1 Likes
The awkward moment, when Usain Bolt runs faster than your internet connection.
Unknown
293 Likes
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I like to put things back where I got them from when I am done using them...so I dropped your mom off at the bar.
Unknown
232 Likes
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That awkward moment when you don't know whether liking a sad status shows your support, or if it means you like their sadness!
Unknown
1004 Likes
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Sunglasses allow an individual to stare at people without them knowing. It is Facebook in real life.
Unknown
722 Likes
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