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Funny But Real Status Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny But Real Status" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
Merely that I have a World Wide Web page does not give me any power, any abilities, nor any status in the real world.
Clifford Stoll
56 Likes
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When I have bad dreams I wake up pissed at the person in real life for like 5 minutes.
Unknown
106 Likes
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Taking your own candy to the movies. $6.00 for a bag of skittles my ass.
Unknown
88 Likes
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There's no panic like trying to press 'End Call' when you make an accidental call.
Unknown
72 Likes
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I'll drink responsibly when there is a brand of vodka named Responsibly.
Unknown
75 Likes
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Just realized the tooth fairy teaches us to sell our body parts for money!
Unknown
50 Likes
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Good choice putting $4,000 rims on your 1998 Honda Civic. That's like Betty White going out and getting her tits done.
Unknown
476 Likes
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Dear McDonald's, Thank you for not selling hot dogs. I don't think I could order a McWiener with a straight face.
Unknown
707 Likes
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Who was the greatest prostitute in history? Ms. Pacman, for 25 cents that b*tch swallowed balls till she died.
Will Ferrell
1343 Likes
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Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fu..ing blue.
Unknown
441 Likes
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When I have children I am going to make them watch the movie 2012 and tell them I survived that like a Boss!
Jorge Armenta
428 Likes
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I hate when I'm wearing my Apple Bottom jeans and I can't find my boots with the furrrr.
Unknown
303 Likes
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I'm the kind of person who would come out of the gym...And go straight to McDonalds.
Unknown
157 Likes
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When a bird hits your window have you ever wondered if God is playing angry birds with you??
Nishan Panwar
504 Likes
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You traded in your iPhone 4 for an extra half inch? Hope your girlfriend doesn't do the same.
Hussein Nishah
443 Likes
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'Lehme gedda uh' = I would like to order something from your fine establishment, but I have to make up my mind first.
Unknown
180 Likes
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Call Of Duty will really have a guy thinking about joining the army...then you realize how many times you died.
Unknown
326 Likes
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I hate when people text me hours later, trying to continue the conversation. bi..., the feeling is gone.
Unknown
128 Likes
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Girls are like Google. They start guessing before you end the sentence.
Unknown
163 Likes
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Words of Wisdom: it's easier to change a condom than it is to change a diaper.
Unknown
128 Likes
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