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Funny Jokes About Being Single Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Jokes About Being Single" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Condoms are like women...most of the time they're pretty annoying, but you need them to get laid.
Unknown
119 Likes
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Simba was walking too slow, so I told him to Mufasa.
Unknown
224 Likes
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Since it started raining all my wife has done is look through the stupid window. If it gets any worse I'll have to let her in.
Nikhil Saluja
103 Likes
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Want to look skinny without losing any weight? Hang out with fat people.
Unknown
210 Likes
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I had a dream that I was drowning in orange soda. Turned out it was just a Fanta sea.
Unknown
93 Likes
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Robert Pattinson must be the only guy in the world who enjoys his girlfriend being on her period.
Unknown
75 Likes
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The only thing we care about is gettin' girls & going to the gym.
Jersey Shore
37 Likes
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Summer vacation: where you drink triple, see double and act single.
Unknown
205 Likes
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I'd rather laugh in bed than do it. If I went to a lady of the night, I'd probably pay her to tell me jokes. Would that be perverted?
Billy Joel
16 Likes
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To all those who said I couldn't make jokes about blind people...watch me.
Unknown
73 Likes
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If my jokes offend you: 1. Im sorry. 2. It wont happen again. 3. 1 & 2 are lies. and 4. get over it.
Unknown
124 Likes
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Being a single parent is twice the work, twice the stress and twice the tears but also twice the hugs, twice the love and twice the pride.
Unknown
360 Likes
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A good wife comes from God and a good husband comes from the bank.
Evans Amecha
51 Likes
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Raising a family is difficult enough. But it's even more difficult for single parents struggling to make ends meet. They don't need more obstacles. They need more opportunities.
Bill Richardson
86 Likes
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Passion has always been important to me. That won't change. What changes in a woman's perspective. I mean, I have two kids now. I'm a single parent balancing motherhood and my career. That changes the equation.
Jody Watley
50 Likes
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Family jokes, through rightly cursed by strangers, are the bond that keeps most families alive
Stella Benson
5 Likes
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A book does not make bad jokes, drink too much or eat more than you can afford to pay for.
Kenneth Turan
129 Likes
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You make jokes because you're afraid to take anything seriously, because if you take things seriously, they matter.
Unknown
18 Likes
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Family jokes, through rightly cursed by strangers, are the bond that keeps most families alive.
Stella Benson
20 Likes
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Most jokes state a bitter truth
Larry Gelbart
7 Likes
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