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Thats Funny Last Time I Checked Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Thats Funny Last Time I Checked" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
The human brain is amazing. It functions 24 hours a day from the time we were born, and only stops when we take exam or when we are in love.
Ritu Ghatourey
476 Likes
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I accidentally bumped into my ex today...With my car...at 60mph...on purpose.
Unknown
933 Likes
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My wife is funny. And I dabble in it. So being funny is big around our house. But what's surprised me is my daughter can do an English accent. I don't know how she learned this.
Jerry Seinfeld
6 Likes
Parent: What did you learn today? Student: Apparently not enough! We have to go back tomorrow!
Unknown
1256 Likes
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Relationships are like fat people, most of them don't work out.
Unknown
2419 Likes
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Taylor Swift seems like the type of chick that would poke a hole in a condom.
Unknown
340 Likes
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That awkward moment when you're checking yourself out in the window of another car and realize there's someone inside.
Unknown
631 Likes
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It's funny, when people talk about the 70s I can tell you the year of every album but when it comes to the later efforts I can't remember the exact years, it's funny isn't it?
Steve Hackett
9 Likes
It's been said good things come to those who wait... All I have to say is whatever is coming to me,better be freaking fantastic!
Nishan Panwar
547 Likes
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I just wanna be rich enough to have Morgan Freeman read me bedtime stories.
Unknown
255 Likes
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Friday is like a superhero that always arrives just in time to stop me from savag... beat... one of my coworkers with a keyboard.
Unknown
344 Likes
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And what's fascinating in The Ten Thousand Things is that although there's time, an inexorable time of the three generations of lives, actively present, but place is the time, time doesn't really have to do with simply the human experience of it.
Robert Creeley
2 Likes
Love takes time. Time to feel, time to loose, and time to be alive.
Unknown
6 Likes
I still can't quite believe it. Although there was something about the fact that it was a first-time writer, a first-time producer, and a first-time director all at the same time.
Sam Mendes
1 Likes
This time around Im not coming back, I know it, this time is different. This time my heart is irrevocably broken, this time I want to do something about it. This time I want to walk away from you, and I hope this time is the last.
Unknown
121 Likes
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The age looks steadily to the redressing of wrong, to the righting of every form of error and injustice; and a tireless and prying philanthropy, which is almost omniscient, is one of the most hopeful characteristics of the time.
Mary Baker Eddy
20 Likes
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I dread no more the first white in my hair, Or even age itself, the easy shoe, The cane, the wrinkled hands, the special chair. Time, doing this to me, may alter too. My sorrow, into something I can bear.
Edna St Vincent Millay
28 Likes
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My fiance and I had a fight over household expenses. He's never had a job in his life, but this didn't stop him demanding that I get another full-time job to pay for video games and beer.
Unknown
48 Likes
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There is a time of life somewhere between the sullen fugues of adolescence and the retrenchments of middle age when human nature becomes so absolutely absorbing one wants to be in the city constantly, even at the height of summer.
Edward Hoagland
1 Likes
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My alarm clock is clearly jealous of my amazing relationship with my bed.
Unknown
2332 Likes
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