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Funny Call Me Maybe Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Call Me Maybe Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
Have you heard about the Irishman who reversed into a car boot sale and sold the engine?
Frank Carson
63 Likes
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A friend will call you an idiot, but a best friend will not only call you one, but act like one with you.
Unknown
319 Likes
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Suppose the world were only one of God's jokes, would you work any the less to make it a good joke instead of a bad one?
George Bernard Shaw
354 Likes
Jokes quotes
If you want anything done well, do it yourself. This is why most people laugh at their own jokes.
Bob Edwards
50 Likes
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The problem with political jokes is they get elected.
Unknown
371 Likes
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The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.
Will Rogers
147 Likes
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Don't steal, don't lie, don't cheat, don't sell drugs. The government hates competition.
Hussein Nishah
526 Likes
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I could be in another country but if someone is waiting on me and they call, I always say I'll be there in 5 minutes.
Unknown
264 Likes
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Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family: Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.
Jane Howard
42 Likes
Family quotes
It is by vivacity and wit that man shines in company; but trite jokes and loud laughter reduce him to a buffoon.
Lord Chesterfield
18 Likes
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My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.
Ellen DeGeneres
84 Likes
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Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office...I will find you. You have my Word.
Unknown
110 Likes
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You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice.
Tommy Cooper
44 Likes
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I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
Steven Wright
47 Likes
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Did you hear about the new reversible jackets? I can't wait to see how they turn out.
Nikhil Saluja
226 Likes
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I had a dream last night, I was eating a ten pound marshmallow. I woke up this morning and the pillow was gone.
Tommy Cooper
72 Likes
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So he said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library.' I thought 'That's a turn-up for the books.'
Tommy Cooper
17 Likes
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If you're being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire. They're trained for that!
Milton Jones
245 Likes
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I stepped on a cornflake this morning...I'm a cereal killer now!
Unknown
294 Likes
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Wanna play a joke on your chiropractor? The next time he starts working on you, go limp and soil yourself.
Mike Wilmot
89 Likes
Funny quotes
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